joke?

[bohemian]

What is the difference between a joke and a rhetorical statement?

 

 

 

 

 

A Software Engineer's wife sends him to the shop with the instructions - "Buy a loaf of bread, and if they have eggs, buy a dozen".

The Software Engineer returns with a dozen loaves of bread....

 

 

Why do Engineers confuse Halloween and Christmas?

Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.

Edited March 17, 2014 by bohemian

[Lance]

When Noah sends his animals to go forth and multiply, a pair of snakes replies “We can't multiply, we're adders” — so Noah builds them a log table.

Groan....

[Lance]

Mindset and perspective

A physicist, a biologist and a mathematician are sitting in a street café watching people entering and leaving the house on the other side of the street. First they see two people entering the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three people leaving the house. The physicist says, "The measurement wasn't accurate." The biologist says, "They must have reproduced." The mathematician says, "If one more person enters the house then it will be empty."

Edited March 18, 2014 by TheDoorGuy

[Lance]

Conclusions drawn on the wrong premise

Premise I: Knowledge is power.

Premise II: Power corrupts.

Conclusion: Therefore, knowledge corrupts.

[bohemian]

I just bought the new football video game FIFA2022, but it wouldn't play. Seems it may be corrupt!

[Rajan]

Irony of life:

the lawyer hopes you get into trouble,

the doctor hopes you get sick,

the police hopes you become a criminal,

the teacher hopes you are born stupid,

the landlord hopes you don't buy a house,

the dentist hope your tooth decays,

the mechanic hope your car breakdown,

the coffin maker wants you dead.........

only a Thief wishes you "prosperity in life" and also wishes "you have a sound sleep"

 

[dilip kumar]

A bus full of housewives going on a picnic ,

fell into a river ,

all died .

Each husband cried for a week ,

one husband continued for more than two weeks !!!

When asked that did he miss his wife so much ?

he replied miserably :

No

My wife

missed

the bus !!!

[Luezette]

Told to me showing we have our own "language."

A thief was in a cemetery one night, hoping to catch an unwary soul.

Two sisters, going home from a meeting that same night took the short cut through the cemetery. They were sharing with each other how they came into the truth. The thief, seeing them, waited until the sisters were close enough for him to pounce on them. This was their conversation:

Sister: you know sis, when I was in the world...

The thief ran.

[Rajan]

 

[dilip kumar]

A elephant and an ant got married.

Next day the elephant died.

What did the ant say?

"For a day's love,you made me dig for life".

Sent from my LG-E988

[dilip kumar]

[11/01 12:24 am] Dilip Kumar: