Phyllis Dillerisms Laughter for Our Souls!

[Allabord4Jah]

One liners!

 

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Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age. As your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
-Phyllis Diller

 

 

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.
-Phyllis Diller

 

 

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.
-Phyllis Diller

 

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.
-Phyllis Diller

 

Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.
-Phyllis Diller

 

I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.'
-Phyllis Diller

 

 

[Luezette]

I especially like the one about marrying a man your own age...

[well]

I especially like the one about marrying a man your own age...

 

Me too! But, then I think there's something called glasses in this world to gain back his eyesight while we can only wait for the new world to gain back our beauty... 

Edited August 3, 2015 by ivy

[Luezette]

So then when he put on his glasses then what? Hahahaha,

[feather]

i miss Phyllis Diller, loved her humor!

  her style reminds me a bit of Maxine greeting cards,

   even looks a little like her

 

[Luezette]

Then there was Erma Bombeck. My absolute favorite:

"If life's a bowl of cherries, why am I always in the pits"?

Edited August 3, 2015 by Luezette