Jump to content
JWTalk - Jehovah's Witnesses Online Community

Gasoline Assistance Application

Recommended Posts

Gasoline Assistance Application

Please read this application agreement thoroughly before signing.

First Name: ____________      Middle Initial: ___      Last Name: _______________ 

Address: _____________________________________________________________

City: ______________________      State: ____      Zip Code: __________________

Please check all that apply to you: 

___ Have no other means of transportation other than a vehicle that operates on gasoline. 

___ Believe that hitch hiking is a dangerous form of transportation. 

___ Physically unable to stowaway in the trunk of a neighbor's car for a free ride to town. 

___  Have depleted all financial resources including but not limited to savings, 401k,  inheritance, etc. 

___ Everyone in your neighborhood has locking gas caps on their vehicles. 

___ Been denied citizenship to Venezuela where rumor has it that gas prices are around $0.14 per gallon. 

In order to qualify for gasoline assistance you must agree to and abide by the terms listed below. You are agreeing to participate in practices that could be deemed unethical, studies, of which could have devastating consequences. Upon signing this document you will be waiving your rights to legal counsel and compensation for any adverse side effects, encounters, etc. you may experience.

For receiving compensation towards your gasoline budget you agree to be a test subject in future trials pertaining to questionable experimentations that will require your complete cooperation.

Compensation amounts: $0.0000001 per gallon will be paid out only after proof of experimentation has taken place. Payments will be mailed out 36,523 days after last day of experiment and will be made payable to the actual participant. 

I have read all the guidelines and agree to abide by all the terms listed above. 

Date: ________________________________ 

Print Name: ___________________________ 

Signature: ____________________________ 

Mail To: 

Quantum Field Study Team 

Cosmic Substation 9, Mars Q10R92 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation with your brothers and sisters!

You can post now, and then we will take you to the membership application. If you are already a member, sign in now to post with your existing account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

About JWTalk.net - Jehovah's Witnesses Online Community

Since 2006, JWTalk has proved to be a well-moderated online community for real Jehovah's Witnesses on the web. However, our community is not an official website of Jehovah's Witnesses. It is not endorsed, sponsored, or maintained by any legal entity used by Jehovah's Witnesses. We are a pro-JW community maintained by brothers and sisters around the world. We expect all community members to be active publishers in their congregations, therefore, please do not apply for membership if you are not currently one of Jehovah's Witnesses.

  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.

JWTalk 22.12.4 (changelog)