Funny use of scriptures :laugh:

[Brother_Bliss]

A young single sister was very much in love with a brother and during the meeting she sends him a folded little piece of paper which said The Song of Solomon 1:2 and the brother sends the little piece of paper back with the text John 2:4.

The Song of Solomon 1:2 =May he kiss me with the kisses of his mouth, for your expressions of endearment are better than wine.

John 2:4 = what have I to do with you woman? My hour has not yet come.

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In the afternoon session of an assembly, right after the lunch break, a brother falls deeply asleep. The brother that's next to him elbows him, opens the Bible and shows him 1 Thessalonians 5:6 "So then, let us not sleep on as the rest do, but let us stay awake and keep our senses."

The brother looks at him kindly and points to the previous page--1Thessalonians 4:11a "and to make it your aim to live quietly and to mind your own business"

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One bright day a brother was making a return visit on an interested person. He rang the doorbell and knocked rather loudly. It was obvious that there was someone home but despite the fact that he knocked several times, nobody opened. Finally the brother took a tract out from his suitcase and wrote on the back of it Revelation 3:20 before leaving it at the door. Later that week when the brother went back to the same return visit, he found his tract on a little table next to the door. Below his cited scripture of Revelation was written Genesis 3:10. The brother opens the Bible and after reading the scripture, blushed and started laughing.

Revelation 3:20 = Look! I am standing at the door and knocking. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come into his house and take the evening meal with him and he with me.

Genesis 3:10 = Finally he said: Your voice I heard in the garden, but I was afraid because I was naked and so I hid myself.

Edited May 13, 2013 by Dismal_Bliss

[dewdrop]

He he thats funny. One of my friend from the congregation used to be like this:laugh:

[Dages]

That's excellent !!!

Need more !

I know one, but... it's in french and i need to translate it with the correct verses... i'll do that.

[Astrid]

oh my, these are great! I'll remember the one with the sleepy person; there's someone in our congregation who is yawning a lot and this will come in handy. *gggg

[Dages]

During the Great Tribulation, 3 brothers are together, in jail, and just one egg... for 3...

As they are full of love for each other, they don't want to eat it, although they are very hungry.

They decide to play a biblical game : if one can find the best verse for this situation, one will eat the egg.

The first brother says : "Colossians 3:9 : 'Strip off the old personality'..."

and "strip off" the egg,

The second brother counters with : "Colossians 4:6 ! 'seasoned with salt' "

And he mimics the gestures of "seasoning with salt" the egg (cause they are in jail... they don't have salt)

The third brother have a little smile and says : " Matthew 25:21 : 'Enter into the joy of your master.’"

And eat the egg!

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I remember some biblical jokes... not with the use of biblical verses... should I ?

[rogelder]

At our one day assembly recently, the CO, in one of his talks used the B part of 1 Timothy 4:7 to make a point......"Be training yourself with godly devotion as your aim." I spoke with him later, and told him I understood the B part of that scripture very well.....but, that I was having considerable trouble understanding the A part....."But turn down the false stories which violate what is holy and which old women tell."

[Brother_Bliss]

I remember some biblical jokes... not with the use of biblical verses... should I ?

Start a new thread and call it 'Biblical jokes' or something similar.

[Brother_Bliss]

Welcome Roger ===>

[retroHelen]

As a bored kid at meetings I sat and read the superscriptions along to top of the pages in my Green NWT Bible. I got a 'telling off' from Mother for laughing during a talk after reading above Matthew 14:7-15:3 "John beheaded.5000 fed." (The Cannibals' Miracle!!):lol1:

[Spydar]

The Bible has so many funny scriptures but I have none at this moment

But the other are really funny

[CK]

I printed this and left it on the table. The CO read, he could n't stop laughing.