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Are Fathers an Endangered Species?


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cut from www.psychologytoday.com/...fathers/.../...

the query sound so strange to me at first reading.....but this is what sum up the reason for fathers being termed as endangered species;

Fathers thrive in a habitat in which they can earn money to support, or help support, their families. They thrive when they have time to spend with their children, time to read to them, to play Monopoly, and to teach them how to cook, or to build things, or to sing and play guitar. (Each of us would have his own list.) They thrive in a habitat in which they have time to think about how to do a better job of taking care of their kids. And although single parents can raise healthy children, many fathers thrive when they have a satisfying relationship with their wives or partners.Fathers might not be endangered — but their habitat is certainly threatened.

Are you the endangered one or have a say on what you have experience from the "endangered species" wether personal or not personal?

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Interesting article.Growing up would have been easier without my father . He had serious issues stemming from time spent in the war and prisons.He was also an orphan raised by relatives who treated him horribly, I believe due to his racial background . I have tried to figure him out to help me feel more compassion toward him.

That's my experience with a father.

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Actually after rereading my post it was not so glum...I have read so much worse on here in the past couple days and weeks and months.... my father was horrible everyone on here whose read my posts knows that.....he was a demon in a mans body , he did horrible things to me.

He may be resurrected.... You are acquitted of your sins when you die....so I fear dealing with him again.

I was terribly scarred by him.....I had no father in my life growing up.I had a mom who was invisable and a man who tortured and tormented and when I'd hear his car coming up the driveway after work I would hide under a bed, in a closet,in the chicken coup or way up underneath our house. Where he found me one day and threw rocks at me until I crawled out to him. He called me a stupid worthless whore my entire life.A worthless dog that nobody wanted. He said he hated me and I ruined his life as he was abusing me time and again.He made me sleep outside with the dogs some nights and sometimes he'd tear off all my clothes and burn them in the fireplace.

So I am always depressed.....Always....And I can't sleep at night ...ever...I never sleep. And he wasn't the only man who 'hurt' me....but he was supposed to be my father and protect me.

So I have a very very bad attitude toward fathers.

Some Days I Am a Bit Glum......So is nearly everybody else on this forum some days.

Isn't that true???

Today I am especially depressed.It was a very bad night and I won't be going to the meeting tonight or in service tomorrow.

But on Saturday I have to be better enough to go to a call....I got this past Saturday in the door to door...she teaches nursing and has a houseful of kids....she invited me in and took the Teach book and said "I really want to give you a hug." And she hugged me.

I will either have to be good enough to go see her or have the friends I was working with to go there.

Don't you find it really hard to keep up with service when you are really emotionally destroyed........I have a very difficult time. I usually give the good ones away.

I love service but I fall apart really easy.

Getting back to fathers.... I am sure there are many reasons they act like they do....Satan caused them to dominate women.For example....the family unit has gotten so out of whack.

So good fathers are just no where to be found.

Part of the question was...

'Are you the endangered one or have a say on what you have experience from the "endangered species" wether personal or not personal?,

So that's my personal experience with the "endangered species."

I have been trying to the best of my ability to view Jehovah as a father . I have read that father article from last year a couple dozen times. I will read it today again.

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Wow Nance, some of the things you wrote are similar to what I dealt with growing up with my dad.

I didn't speak to him for 10 yrs, just reconciled with him a couple of years ago. For my dad, his wife leaving him, his kids cutting him off made him rethink his past actions and work on being a better person. The man I have gotten to know the last two years is the not the same man who raised me. I am very fortunate that he really evaluated his life, really read the bible, and did lots of praying to Jehovah, because it has all worked. He is a much better person. Sometimes when we are speaking I say to myself "who is this person", he is just so different now. I am glad I gave him a second chance, although I was really scared when I spoke to him on the phone 2 yrs ago. He sounded apologetic and sincere, but I was so afraid that when he visited me, it would be like it use to be. I was a nervous wreck as he was driving to Texas from Illinois, the closer he got, the more afraid I got. For me, I am very fortunate that my dad is now in my life again, just wish for so many people out there, they have an outcome as good as I have had.

I am so sorry you went through what you did, but you said that "so good fathers are just no where to be found". They are out there, I am married to one. He is an incredible father, I think alot of it comes from his father walking out on him when he was 4. He didn't see him again for almost 20 yrs, when his dad called him and said "I'm dying, I'd like to see you" Somehow, growing up without a father has made him an awesome father. My husband has also wondered about his dad getting resurrected and how that will work with him, but he knows that Jehovah will take care of things.

So good fathers are out there, I know many, but I can understand why you feel the way you do towards fathers.

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I was mistaken and thought your father was an elder....sorry about that.

I really understand the fear .

If you are talking to me, he was an elder while i was growing up, which makes what we all went through even harder. It also caused me to leave the truth for many years cause i felt there was hypocrisy in the organization. I was pretty messed up for many, many years. Have really only felt at peace about my childhood for a few years now.

Its a long process, hang in there.

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Dads really are an endangered species!

At one time I thought it was one or another culture whose dads ran off after impregnating the mom. But it seems like more dads than not leave. Fortunately we have the truth where the dads are very responsible and hopefully not pervs and/or abusive in any way. Faith I'm so sorry that you are still suffering from your fathers sickness. Focus only on the time when soon all of the former things will not come to mind. Satan really is in control of this ol system!

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Dads really are an endangered species!

At one time I thought it was one or another culture whose dads ran off after impregnating the mom. But it seems like more dads than not leave. Fortunately we have the truth where the dads are very responsible and hopefully not pervs and/or abusive in any way. Faith I'm so sorry that you are still suffering from your fathers sickness. Focus only on the time when soon all of the former things will not come to mind. Satan really is in control of this ol system!

I am having a hard time focusing lately...I have hit deep depression of some sort....Yes Ava explained about her father... That would be terribly difficult, stumbling in fact.

It is wonderful that matters have improved with her father.

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  • 2 weeks later...

When I read the title of your post Nancy I thought "gosh, I hope so,". Me and my 2 sisters were all married very young. I was 17 and had just graduated HS. My sisters each married in their junior year of high school. They attended senior year of high school as a married woman. "Neither was pregnant-just wanting to escape). I remember my father coming home late at night (from drinking) and screaming at my mother because his supper was not hot. There was no microwaves back then. He would then go into a rage and start throwing his food at the walls. Broken dishes everywhere, I would lay in bed and cry then finally start screaming for him to shut up. My mother would come down the hall and into my room and grab me and beg me to be quiet so he would shut up. This could go on for hours! In the morning I would find him happy, like he had no idea why mom was on the floor cleaning up food and broken dishes. ,now my sisters and I think he was just never died as having a mental disorder. He could switch from fun loving life of the party to so mean! So hard to have a family. We are all so messed up,

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