Sisters/ Friends

[surfergirl]

I have always had trouble starting conversations and communicating.

I find it so easy to come on the forum. I don't have to face anybody.

I love to have friends over. & be hospitable. I wonder what to say. Yesterday I had some friends over. For afternoon tea. Kinda a small party for the kids,

But I do like to hangout with the girls. So what do you talk about.

Like I have had 2 occassions where both married woman have named a brother. someone elses hubby as cute. Hot. & yesterday one was going on about her sons mates having hot bods.etc. I only ever heard that talk at school. I didn't think anybody married spoke like it. I am No way perfect. I am as Stubborn as you can imagine. I am sure I rub of the wrong way and get on others nerves too,

I find what men talk about to be more interesting. Say Surfing,. waves. Cars & the Old Classics like Mustangs & anything Mechanical.

So girls please. Any tips I would love.

agape

[Tazzy]

I find the topics many sisters talk about boring and shallow too. We had a thread somewhere on this very topic but I can't find it. There are several of us on here who were talking about this very thing. Can't remember if we got into tips or how to change the topic.

One thing I can not endure is gossips! The other night I stopped at the store for a quick trip in and out. Met a sister I hadn't seen in years. In the space of a few minutes I knew more about people in the congregations from all around. Not positive things mind you! She barely took a breath! I was trying to politely part company and didn't want to offend her because she was just recently reinstated. I find pockets of places where gossip is more ingrained than others. Seems once the pattern gets a toe hold it is hard to change it.

I keep to myself pretty much but sometimes feel I need to try and engage others more. I tend to gravitate to those much older than me or young ones my kids ages.

Could care less about fashion, decorating, shopping, shoes, etc so I am at loss to contribute when those are the main topics.

[surfergirl]

I kinda remember a similar topic too.

Afterwards I felt awkward. I don't want to put anyone of or out. I know we need each other. I find it hard to fit in around people my age and socially.

It bothers me for a while.

[bagwell1987]

I find the topics many sisters talk about boring and shallow too. We had a thread somewhere on this very topic but I can't find it. There are several of us on here who were talking about this very thing. Can't remember if we got into tips or how to change the topic. One thing I can not endure is gossips! The other night I stopped at the store for a quick trip in and out. Met a sister I hadn't seen in years. In the space of a few minutes I knew more about people in the congregations from all around. Not positive things mind you! She barely took a breath! I was trying to politely part company and didn't want to offend her because she was just recently reinstated. I find pockets of places where gossip is more ingrained than others. Seems once the pattern gets a toe hold it is hard to change it. I keep to myself pretty much but sometimes feel I need to try and engage others more. I tend to gravitate to those much older than me or young ones my kids ages. Could care less about fashion' date=' decorating, shopping, shoes, etc so I am at loss to contribute when those are the main topics.[/quote']

OMGoodness, Gabe and Tazzy you are talkin' my talk! I feel the same way. High fashion, shopping trips and the latest female cosmetic is.....oh wait I had to yawn! If I have my preference I'd choose to be in a small car group of brothers. We can talk about the latest car- Dodge Dart- or the front end of my van that needs fixed. Or how about the "new to me" rototiller that needs tuned up for spring, it's not far off. Or maybe just to "donut or not to donut?" I'm thankful to my mate too that he shares things with me when he comes home from work. We get into the best conversations about the Danglehead he runs. How it runs, has a hydrolic leak and how he found it (hard to do sometimes) the grab arms and the butt saw. When we drive out in service and I see a lo-boy with a machine on it I'll say "oh, there goes a loader, or a delimber or a rock crusher". The girls look at me like I'm insane. And cars?? Some sisters don't like me to ride in their car because if I 'hear' a noise I'll mention it to them. Auto repair is fun.

I got a comment from a brother a few weeks ago, I love him dearly and it wasn't taken personally. He said "you look like your husband from the knees down!" My favorite shoes are my romeo's. If I could get away with wearing them to meeting I would. Mostly I wear them because I have very bad feet and the romeo holds it's shape better than any 'girlie' shoe. Ok, I've ranted enough. Golly it's nice to hear from other sis's that they feel the same way I do. I know I didn't mention gossip-y sis's but that is a problem everywhere. Some sis's need the attention I guess.

[DW]

Dear Sisters!

I had to laugh. It is tough to find interesting conversation isn't it? How about it from my perspective? I'm a brother, but I don't like sports! I'm lost.

-Dave

[Tazzy]

Lol! It's so nice to hear I have sisters like me!

So sorry , Dave , I can see how lack of interest in sports would leave a brother in the sidelines,

I LOVE hockey!

[bagwell1987]

football....football....football...rah...rah...rah... Sorry Dave, had to do it

Wondering what to have for Super Bowl- pizza or tacos!

Hey Dave- what about beer? that's a good topic, at least it works with my local bro's!

[LeslieDean]

Hummm, let me see. When we are with our friends--which is often since I aux pioner and my sister is a full time pioneer our conversations center around experiences --or lack of--experiences in the ministry. We have been doing witnessing on Fridays (first and last Friday of each month) to kick start and wind up our time in service for the month. We go out until midnight on Friday with some of the sisters that work during the week --we may start our time in the am and do 3-4 hours then go home-clean- do errands or rest and then meet up with them at 6pm. Our conversations vary depending on who is in the group. We have single sisters, married sisters and one single sister with a 13 yr old daughter. I am married to a nonbeliever so there is always lively conversation of support offered by my sistas! There are married sisters with husbands who are elders and MS so there is extra bits of upbuilding, insightful things they share with us. We also do our Bible reading for the day and take turns--so we talk about different aspects of what we read. We seldom talk about fashion per se unless it is to notice someone or child is wearing something new and how nice they look in it--then they tell us how much they got it on sale for. There is alot of talk about recipes since we have many who like to cook or who want to learn. One sister shared how she made an outdoor picnic table following the directions from a home show on TV. We talk about so many encouraging things. We did mention seeing a new show on HGTV that has four handsome young men that do home remodeling and the name of the show is "Buillt" a play on words most surely. We talk about our studies and how we learned the Truth and ways our views on things have increased. I can't think of any of the sisters in our KH--even the young ones who talk about alot of superficial things.

[ava]

I am 41, and the sisters I hang out with are in my age group, married like me and have kids like I do. We really don't talk about cosmetics or hair or shopping, lol. We talk about things are kids are dealing with, jobs, money issues, husbands, we also talk about friends at the hall, but not gossiping. Just last week I went out with some of the sisters, a girls night out without the husbands and kids, and we did talk about some at the hall, but we were talking about ones who were ill or something and seeing if there is any help they need with food and stuff. We also had a sister who is married to a non witness, and she just filed for divorce, so we were talking with her and trying to give her some comfort. Despite the divorce being the best thing for her considering what she has endured the last 10 yrs, divorce is still very difficult for anyone.

We also talk about what we as moms and wives are dealing with. Pressure of working, taking care of the home, husbands gone alot due to their jobs and them being elders/ms, and menopause, lol, and just all the pressure this world is placing on all of us and how we are trying to cope with it.

We do exchange recipes as well. We are always looking for a good meal that we can make for a family that is not tough on the family budget.

Fashion, shopping, hair, makeup does not come up with my friends, lol. My daughter is 16 and those are big topics with her and her friends, but not with my friends.

[bagwell1987]

We go out until midnight on Friday with some of the sisters that work during the week --we may start our time in the am and do 3-4 hours then go home-clean- do errands or rest and then meet up with

them at 6pm

REALLY??? Cool! Do you live in a city area? We are very rural with many vacation homes. I just started to do public bus, and like the sis on the DVD for tomorrow night who went on the Ships- I don't know all the ins and outs but am being brave:eek:. The bus runs here from 6 am to 8 or 9 PM so we have a big window of time for riding.

The sisters in this hall are more mature and are super interesting to talk with. Pleasant to be around.

[LeslieDean]

We are a suburb (of Tulsa, Ok --population 400,000) but Tulsa has several bedroom communities surrounding it 30,000 to 40,000 population each. We are comprised of a small town and a large rural area. When we do evening/night work we got to the GreyHound terminal downtown and several of the large trucking stops (Flying J), hospitals, motels (desk clerks are always lonely at night) and pop and mom convience stores. It is great fun because sometimes we get the tired sillies. But we are all liking it more and more!

[bagwell1987]

We are a suburb (of Tulsa, Ok --population 400,000) but Tulsa has several bedroom communities surrounding it 30,000 to 40,000 population each. We are comprised of a small town and a large rural area. When we do evening/night work we got to the GreyHound terminal downtown and several of the large trucking stops (Flying J), hospitals, motels (desk clerks are always lonely at night) and pop and mom convience stores. It is great fun because sometimes we get the tired sillies. But we are all liking it more and more!

Leslie, that is so wonderful. You do have a large community. In my town I'll guess 2,000 people who live here. In the neighboring towns where I work (and frequently ride to bus to and from) is 10,000 and 5,000. They are the County Seat so they have all the county offices and such. But I never thought of Hospitals and motels or even the TimeShare condo here is a possibility. This is inspiring, thanks for sharing!

[JudyO]

Dear Sisters!

I had to laugh. It is tough to find interesting conversation isn't it? How about it from my perspective? I'm a brother, but I don't like sports! I'm lost.

-Dave

Dave!! There is absolutely NOTHING better than a nice football game on a Sunday afternoon after the meeting and lunch....I get my best naps with the crowd's "white" noise in the background !!!! LOL But I couldn't tell you a single thing about the game itself.

[LeslieDean]

Judy, it keeps the husbands busy and just put some little bowls of food and drinks out and they are just like cats---self tending!

[NSSewer]

Oh Gabe my word??!! Wowee! We really are living in the last days! Now in the congregation we clearly see those brothers and sisters who are very shapely or very ripped with muscles every where. We are aware of those Bible characters that were beautiful in face and form. Jesus Christ was probably very very muscled and masculine but that is not what he stressed or wanted us to dwell on. It would be easy to let our minds wander on such things married or single. I quickly ask forgiveness if my mind wanders before I get a hold of it, because I too have an extremely vivid imagination and am sometimes embarrassed by it.

Now as far as in a group setting , there are some who only want to talk about sexual things or TV people or too much food and drink, but there is no place among God's people who are spiritual to discuss such things; these sound more fleshly and we want to stay away from these. Really we never want to be known as a potty mouth, I know sisters who do this and you kinda want to stay away from them. But if I'm in a car group and stuck there I just steer the conversation, to, wasn't the Daily Text so amazing and discuss it, or, isn't this Sunday's/Saturday's Watchtower so appropriate and discuss why, or, I can't wait for this years convention and then go on to explain why you look forward to it. So we all probably have dirty thoughts all day long but we certainly want to curtail those thoughts to things about Jehovah and his wholesomeness.

The sisters and I also talk about sewing and crocheting and others about knitting which I don't do. Or we have discussions about what we do to bear up under this system of things or about daily life. One CO said Jehovah leaves us to be free agents on our own time and we can do what we want but of course we always want to do things for Jehovah's glory because we don't want to fail Jehovah or make him hurt in any way. Because he is so grand his hurt would be too much for me to think about.

[Myree]

Imagine if the shoe was on the other foot and the brothers talked about sisters in that way, commenting on who's hot - they'd probably be up before the elders!

It's better to keep social occasions small. It was a good idea to have an afternoon tea with a few sisters. I have been at bigger social events, and as the night went on, some of the conversation wasn't upbuilding.

There are some sisters who are obsessed with fashion. They go clothes shopping at discount stores, and then sell these clothes online, and people come to their homes to pick up the items - so they basically have to be home that day. I couldn't be bothered. I go to the shopping centre to do my groceries and when I need to get other items, but don't religiously window shop a few days a week like some sisters do.

I grew up with 3 brothers so also prefer conversation with men, because I'm not a girly girl, although some men are so obsessed with sport it's all they talk about, and that bores me after a while.

We also live on the coast, my sons are surfing fanatics, and a lot of the families go to the beach. Sometimes we just send a text saying we're going to the local beach, all welcome. So the boys can surf, my daughter can swim, and others can sit under their umbrellas if they don't want to go into the water.

There is such a variety of ages in the congregation - we have quite a few families the same age so talk about kids issues, school etc. It's also nice to talk with the older sisters. The conversation can always be steered back to something wholesome by asking others how they first heard the truth.

One of my favourite social occasions of the week is after Saturday morning witnessing, when we go back to someone's house for morning tea, and share our experiences of the morning, and have a good laugh, and also encourage those who need it (don't we all). I come home with my children better able to cope with the weekend's activities.