Screeching babies and clueless parents

[trottigy]

If you don't ask you get into BIG trouble ::

Do what you can to make things better

[Musky]

Well at least it's not as bad as at one Hall where an old lady used to pop out to take a nip of whiskey from a flask in her purse/handbag!

Now there's an idea. I think it would calm me right down!

Here all this time I thought that was the cause of your attitude!

[Elijahsmama]

Well my new plan is when anyone] gets cranky, rude, unloving, disrespectful, gossipy and whatever other mean selfish trait we think of should be taken outside for a spanking. I will probably be outside once in a while myself, but this plan might help out the whole congregation. Help the elders out too. My co comes the end of the month, he will probably put my suggestion into his letter to the branch. And I am sure it will be in a watchtower (which makes it a rule not a suggestion) sometime next year. So we should all be warned.

On the other hand my co my never let me pioneer again.

[trottigy]

Woo hoo

I'll probably be out there getting spanked a few times myself

[LizzyJo]

One other suggestion, I sit in the first row, all the parents sit in the last row, I never hear anything. Try sitting up front, you'd be surprised how little distraction there is at the hall.

I sit in the second row back from the front and I am almost deaf, but as I explained, the mothers take the screamers into the lobby which is built like an echo chamber instead of to the mothers' room where there is a rocking chair and a built-in speaker so they don't have to miss any of the meeting, When the screamer calms down they both come back to the main hall. Simplr.no?

Guess not.

[LizzyJo]

Well I guess today's text January 5 can be applied here. So we would want to follow the slaves council to keep peace. Pursuing peace sometimes means we need to keep to ourselves and show humility even when we are right.

The point of today's text is not to make stumbling blocks for others. Don't you think that street runs both ways? Peace is nice, I'd like to be able to sit in a meeting and have some.

Are you suggesting that these parents whose babies are crying are causing stumbling blocks for you? Really?

YES

And not just me. There are others. I have just posted here so you make me the target. I was thinking about staying home and listening by telephone, but others have told he they tried that and can hear the crying over the phone system

[LizzyJo]

Lizzy - you crack me up. Any chance you could move to Vegas?

I don't know--are there screamers there?

[LizzyJo]

Well my new plan is when anyone] gets cranky, rude, unloving, disrespectful, gossipy and whatever other mean selfish trait we think of should be taken outside for a spanking. I will probably be outside once in a while myself, but this plan might help out the whole congregation.

Not a spanking, there was another thread on that. How about a time out in another room with a door? Works for me and that's all I wanted in my original post.

[ava]

Well I guess today's text January 5 can be applied here. So we would want to follow the slaves council to keep peace. Pursuing peace sometimes means we need to keep to ourselves and show humility even when we are right.

The point of today's text is not to make stumbling blocks for others. Don't you think that street runs both ways? Peace is nice, I'd like to be able to sit in a meeting and have some.

Are you suggesting that these parents whose babies are crying are causing stumbling blocks for you? Really?

YES

And not just me. There are others. I have just posted here so you make me the target. I was thinking about staying home and listening by telephone, but others have told he they tried that and can hear the crying over the phone system

I was not making you a target, I was simply asking you a question. I have heard many things that have caused stumbling blocks for our brothers and sisters, but never a crying baby.

As many have said already, patience is needed, a little understanding and compassion and empathy for all our brothers and sisters. We all stumble each other every day, but let's remember we are trying our best to serve Jehovah, and none of us are perfect and we all have issues and we all do things to hurt and annoy each other. It's never with malicious intent though, it's simply imperfection.

We all love each other and most importantly we all love Jehovah.

[Musky]

YES

And not just me. There are others. I have just posted here so you make me the target. I was thinking about staying home and listening by telephone, but others have told he they tried that and can hear the crying over the phone system

You made yourself a target with bitter, unloving comments that were insults to your fellow publishers as well as your elder body. I'm sure you got the attention that you wanted when you started this topic.

[LizzyJo]

Are you suggesting that these parents whose babies are crying are causing stumbling blocks for you?

This part was simply asking a question

Really?

This part wasn't.

In the latter part of my post about the target, I was trying to make a comment along the line of "Don't shoot the messenger"

[LizzyJo]

You made yourself a target with bitter, unloving comments that were insults to your fellow publishers as well as your elder body. I'm sure you got the attention that you wanted when you started this topic.

How interesting. Make me a target if it pleases you, Musky. Until the last Ava comment I didn't feel like a target and she even said in her reply that she was not making me a target. I did a follow-up post to her that I think explained things a bit better. But thanks for the shot from left field.

[LizzyJo]

Here all this time I thought that was the cause of your attitude!

Nice. I overlooked it the first time because I thought it was going on with the comic theme this has turned into, but after your last comment (did you even read my OP?) I am not so sure you meant it in a kind way or even a funny way, No, the emoticon doesn't get you out of this one.

[ava]

Are you suggesting that these parents whose babies are crying are causing stumbling blocks for you?

This part was simply asking a question

Really?

This part wasn't.

In the latter part of my post about the target, I was trying to make a comment along the line of "Don't shoot the messenger"

My "Really" was a question, I really just didn't understand your statement when today's text was brought up to you. When I said "Really" I was stressing a point.

I am not shooting the messenger. I do not attend your congregation, and no one from your congregation is hear discussing this matter except for you, so all we have is your comments, not other's from your congregation.

That being said, I am sorry this appears to be such an issue in your congregation, but really, this is a matter for you local elders, not members on this forum. Many here have given excellent advice, only you can decide how to pursue this matter within your congregation, it really though is a matter for your local congregation.

[LizzyJo]

Many here have given excellent advice, only you can decide how to pursue this matter within your congregation, it really though is a matter for your local congregation.

Yes I have received excellent advice and I thank all but one of you.

[Musky]

Here all this time I thought that was the cause of your attitude!

Nice. I overlooked it the first time because I thought it was going on with the comic theme this has turned into, but after your last comment (did you even read my OP?) I am not so sure you meant it in a kind way or even a funny way, No, the emoticon doesn't get you out of this one.

That actually was a joke, as was your response to Helen's post. I'm sorry you didn't appreciate it!

Oh, and I don't have anything I need to "get out of" :)

I'm glad you got the advice you were looking for, so all's well!

[Elijahsmama]

Many here have given excellent advice, only you can decide how to pursue this matter within your congregation, it really though is a matter for your local congregation.

Yes I have received excellent advice and I thank all but one of you.

I can hear/see/read comments like that on worldly sites. I didn't take this thread as a joke. I made a light hearted comment because I thought it was too serious. I do however, take bashing elders and our friends seriously. The anonymity of the Internet doesn't give us the right to say such things. We are required to put up with another, warts, crying babies and all. If we have a problem at the hall we are in, move... Unfortunately we will still have imperfect elders, crying babies and people who don't listen to council. That's just the way it is.

[trottigy]

So true Heather

Great post..

[Greenfield]

I will say this: I have never seen anything cause as much controversy in the congregation as people telling other people what to do. The elders have to do this sometimes - I don't envy that - and generally they are very conscious of the fact that they only should do this when absolutely necessary.

[Blueyedchanel]

You know we are all imperfect and have our faults. I have 2 kids that are 3 and 4, my husbands an unbeliever so I'm on my own at the meetings. I'm very aware of my children's behavior and noise factor and keep it to a minimum as best as I can. I've never had anyone complain to me, in fact I've been complimented on how well behaved my kids are (most of the time, they all have their moments). That's only because I take mine outside or to the bathroom for discipline if they start acting up. Just for arguments sake, maybe the parents "tune it out" OR they just don't realize it's bothering others in the congregation, have you considered approaching them in a loving manner yourself?

I found that when humor is used it can soften a conversation that otherwise could be difficult. Also by redirecting the focus from being the parents are in the wrong and giving a finger pointing approach, try twisting the reasoning by making it that you are the one that NEEDS help. Make a joke like, "you know I'm no spring chicken anymore and my hearing is just going down the toilet and sometimes when sweet little (insert name here) gets to talking/crying/etc I have a really hard time hearing the speaker.". Tell them you used to have young children at one time, you know how children can be and maybe offer a little inexpensive "quiet" gift that could be a nice distraction for the child like a pack of colors and a $1 notepad. My kids used to love to take stickers off sticker sheets and just put them in a note book. It was quiet and kept their hands busy, at 1 to 3 a child can't read or barley write so crayons or stickers are a nice distraction for them. When talking to them make it seem like its YOU that is the problem because of your hearing issues and that you are kindly asking them to help YOU out by taking the kids out or distracting them better. That may help soften the blow, I know as a parent I'm very sensitive of anyone being critical of my parenting skills or my children so by turning the focus on you needing their help more than on your children are loud and distracting and you are a terrible parent, it may go over better that way.

Last but not least, one thing I have had to learn is that you can't control other people. You can only control what you do, so maybe taking the matter to Jehovah in prayer asking him to help you be patient, more tolerant, understanding, loving, etc, will help you also. Maybe pray for help on focusing during the meeting, aske Jehovah for help in "tuning out" the crying. Just a thought. Hope it gets better for you soon.

[Poly Ester]

I usually sit 2 or 3 rows from the front... precisely because of crying and screaming babies.... yes they do distract me but if I sit far forward then I am ok.

I have gone through the screaming times with my own children.... and if I had ever heard ANYONE refer to them as 'screamers' I think I would have been appalled and questioned them, they are babies or young children, who are loved by Jehovah.

I have utmost sympathy with mothers who both try to keep their babies quiet (impossible) and at the same time get spiritually fed themselves. Cut them some slack and instead of moaning, go up and congratulate them on the fact that they have made it to the meeting at all.... maybe show some kindness and love by offering to help them ?

I am sure that they would appreciate it... many of them are probably struggling and wondering if their baby or child will ever be good at the meetings.... they eventually grow up and believe me my children now in their 20's no longer scream, cry, colour or sleep on the floor during the meetings I am genuinely grateful for all the help I received from kind, loving sisters during their childhood years .... !!!!

[Joey]

Just a thought on this, my son was a fairly quiet baby and child but when he got fussy an elderly brother, a grandpa of many in our circuit came and took him from me and walked him in the back, he wouldn't make a peep in that brothers arms. Wow, did I appreciate that.

I need to send that brother a thank you card after reading this thread.

[surfergirl]

I love the Older folk. As a young person growing up un the truth there wasn't many my age & they became like my other grandparents or family. I have treasured many dear ones. I think it goes a long way from when one is a baby til what ever age you can express yourself...I have seen mums with crying babies & I have been there & just passed the potty training now. When you are a new mum you love to have company or someone who is understanding. I would try to carry on life normally with preaching & you know I tried to get some bible studies so I could take my babies. Or I would have many for dinner or afternoon cuppa. I would include the Oldies as well. For years not one has returned invites for dinner because I have young kids. I teach them to respect both people & other peoples belongings. I have even been told how to correct my children & when I do The same persons will say you are being to harsh. Its ok they are learning. Or will redo the girls hair. Or maybe I have raced out the door forgot a jacket. Then I am made to feel like a bad mum.

All you want to do is go out & lean on Jah so you can be apart of the arrangements set up..It is hard going for new mums. & They may have a hubby. But the hubby is looking after the sound or Mikes..As a mum you just want to be apart of the family.

We do have some Mums they only come on Sundays. With their kids & they eat & drink & cry a lot. But you can't say anything its sad but also discouraging.

I have found also Some Oldies when you go to the shops to be not so politie. I have had my son his pram & my 2 daughters concerntrating & suddenly a trolley has been shoved in my back or toes run over. Or you are pushed out of the way..

When I think about all that has been said it is easy to look at the negatives. For myself I have asked myself What do I value about each person in the cong. See the good things each one has done. Kids are told to say hello & treat the grey hairs with respect. as said in the scriptures. But can also the Elderly be kind first & not get annoyed with the young ones who have been sitting quietly for 2hrs to the best of there abilities ) not Get to upset.