My Research: Jaffa Cakes Evolved into Wedding Cakes

[EccentricM]

 

I have proven with the modern scientific method that Jaffa Cakes are direct ancestors of wedding cakes.  

 

 

 

 

A small cake (or biscuit) eventually became a wedding cake. I discovered this when I looked on the back of the box. The ingredients. 

 

Quote

Ingredients

• Glucose-Fructose Syrup, 
• Plain Chocolate (19%) [Sugar, Cocoa Mass, Vegetable Fats (Palm, Sal and/or Shea), Butter Oil (Milk), Cocoa Butter, Emulsifiers (Soya Lecithin, E476), Natural Flavouring], 
• Sugar, 
• Flour (Wheat Flour, Calcium, Iron, Niacin, Thiamin), 
• Whole Egg, 
• Water, 
• Dextrose,
• Concentrated Orange Juice (8% Orange Juice Equivalent), 
• Glucose Syrup, 
• Vegetable Oils (Sunflower, Palm), 
• Humectant (Glycerine), 
• Gelling Agent (Pectin), 
• Acid (Citric Acid), 
• Raising Agents (Ammonium Bicarbonate, Disodium Diphosphate, Sodium Bicarbonate), 
• Dried Whole Egg, 
• Acidity Regulator (Sodium Citrates), 
• Natural Orange Flavouring, 
• Colour (Curcumin), 
• Emulsifier (Soya Lecithin)

 

 

Now, looking at wedding cakes:

 

Quote

• 375g/13oz butter, plus extra for greasing.
• 225g/8oz dark brown sugar.
• 150g/5½oz caster sugar.
• 4 tsp vanilla essence.
• 12 free-range eggs.
• 410g/14½oz currants.
• 550g/1lb 4oz raisins.
• 850g/1lb 14oz sultanas.

 

Some differences, but also some things are the same. Both use sugar and eggs. Some even have chocolate, but there is variety.  

 

Now, I know one developed into the other just through this. They look similar, they have similar ingredients, but also there are loads of other cakes in between as well! I line them up in sizes to show how one became the other when moved to different cupboards and pantries.  

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_cakes

 

As you can see, they all are related. Their environments caused them transform. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now, you might ask, where is the evidence of the transformation? Well, I 'v looked, I'v only found half eaten cakes, cakes in bins, some melted, discoloured, crumbs and even lone ingredients. But it's enough to assert that these cakes evolved from one another!  

 

We'll find these missing links and half/half transformations eventually, but for now I'm going to teach this in my schools as a fact.  My curriculum shows the ingredients alone, then them forming into a base, that base becoming a Jaffa cake and then into several smaller cakes in between and then a wedding cake. I list the shared ingredients and tell them that in the cupboard the heat and air environment caused all these wonderful variations which are so spectacular and specific, you'd think someone made them!  

 

 

Thank you for your time. If you believe in bakers, you're an imbecile. 

 

 

Edited November 25, 2017 by EccentricM

[Musky]

"Film at 11"

[Tortuga]

[kejedo]

Cake, biscuit, cookie? Originally a cake was pulled out of the pan and popped back in the oven, baked twice, like the Italian biscotti, (accent on the bi syllable) which is twice baked (or cooked.) Cookies in USA  =  biscuits in UK, or so I hear tell.  Orange you confused? I'm assuming this is tongue in cheek or confection in mouth. 

 

At any rate, I enjoyed the proof, which in case of pudding is in the eating. I'm sure I've been correctly referred to as an imbecile at least a cuppla times. 

 

OT I frosted  a bunch of cupcakes en-mass for a get-together (frosted, and covered with animal crackers, which are actually cookies.) I know this has been around for some time, but it was a surprise for the young ones that they could pull them apart, one by one, and no slicing.  

 

Why is there no confection which is called a bakey? And how come a ham from the oven is  called baked ham, but a turkey from the same process is rendered Roast Turkey.  More imponderables. So, excuse me while I have a Graham cracker, which is obviously not a cracker, and I hope not named for Billy.

[kejedo]

P.S. My husband drove a bread truck for international Bakers. So should I say my sons all come from the baker or the bread man?

[EccentricM]

14 minutes ago, kejedo said:

Cake, biscuit, cookie? Originally a cake was pulled out of the pan and popped back in the oven, baked twice, like the Italian biscotti, (accent on the bi syllable) which is twice baked (or cooked.) Cookies in USA  =  biscuits in UK, or so I hear tell. 

 

This is true. It's actually one of the great British debates on whether a Jaffa cake is a biscuit or a cake. 

 

Clearly though, according to the reliable science of my evolutionary studies, it is a cake, the great ancestor of all cakes!

[kejedo]

When being developed in Tuscany, the biscotti were called Biscotti de Prato, then changed to cantuccini as the sweet treat gained momentum.  Usually, I am surprised if even one person in the room gets me, at all. But sometimes it's two. Will wonders never end? (rhetorical question).  

 

When I moved to this area, I pronounced Baruch as "Bar Uke," but was corrected by a long time Bethelite to say "Barrack."  NOw we have been re-corrected to say it as "Bar Uke. I know our brothers are always studying the history/ accuracy of linguistics. Now that's a research job I would like, but I don't think we will see much of that in the N.S. 

 

Don't get me started on Sanhedrin, Philistines, Pythagorean, or pronunciation of that Greek word-number  (pie vs pee), which is as irrational as I can be at times. I wish the current debate around here would be cookie vs bakey, instead of the New US Tax code, which is actually longer than the beard thread, and much less fun. 

Edited December 6, 2017 by kejedo

[ChocoBro]

One further vital proof is that they all end up in the same state after going through the digestion process...

 

They are stored as body fat.  What were you thinking I meant??