Is It Wrong To Ask For Help?

[Lori]

Not many of you know that I was disfellowshipped back in 2003,  and came back to the meetings almost immediately.  I was reinstated in 2005ish...  

I stopped coming to the meetings for a while,  because I was really depressed,  suicidal even...     I've been regularly attending meetings since  2018 on Zoom.   

 

Before I was very inactive.   I didn't participate in the ministry.     

 

Fast forward to 2024,  I still attend meetings, but sometimes I miss some due to oversleeping, internet issues, or just forgetting.   I am struggling EVERY DAY to remain in the Truth.    I have severe depression again,  horrible anxiety and panic attacks.   I have trouble even studying for the meetings and about 70% I don't study for the meetings.  I have a hard time paying attention during the meetings.    (There are some feelings of not belonging with the current congregation.  Long story)     I'm having a VERY hard time praying.  I barely pray anymore.   

I've seen this before with myself...  I become inactive and stop going to the meetings.   And I DO NOT want to do that again. 

 

I asked a dear sister that I've known almost 29 years if she'd do a study with me.   She said that she would, but she's in another congregation.   (We are very close and I feel comfortable with her. So I feel like I would get more out of the study).   Anyways... I sent a text to one of the Elders of my congregation and asked about getting a study.    I just feel like I need to focus on my spirituality and I can't do it alone.    I just feel like he doesn't think that I need a study.         To me,  this is a cry for help for me.    I never reached out before.   

 

I can't go on how I'm feeling or how I'm neglecting my spirituality.   

 

I'm going to fall into being inactive or even leave again. 

 

I don't know what to do. 

 

Please help me. 

[FionaM]

Lori, I feel for you. You sound like you have alot going on.
May I ask what you think a study will do?
You already know it's the truth.
I'm wondering if it's really a study you need??
Encouragement or support would be better maybe?
Perhaps ask a couple in your congregation if you can join in their family study once in a while, or ask a few families maybe?
From what you have said, I wouldn't think a study is needed either.
You have given many reasons why meeting attendance is a little lax at times, but when we feel something is important we make sure we are there. Do you miss work because of over sleeping, I telnet issues, or just for forgetting? See my point.
I wonder if you are an all or nothing person? You don't feel good enough until your doing EVERYTHING you should?

I might be totally wrong and if so please forgive me and only consider what you feel is right.

Maybe your expectations are a little high?

I would suggest you try and set small goals. Perhaps regular meeting attendance. (As you would work).
And daily bible reading. And meditation. Make those your priority for a month. Then next month add to that another small goal, maybe weekly watchtower preparation.

I just wonder if your struggling and taking on too much at once. Small steps.

As regards to prayer. Your father wants to hear how your feeling. Maybe just set an alarm for even just once a day to start and no matter what when your alarm goes, you just go talk to him, even about mundane things.
You are beyond the "milk" stage of the truth. Other in the Cong can definitely encourage, seek those ones out, but they cannot carry you. And you will enjoy the truth far more, the more effort you put into it.
But don't expect you can do it all when your struggling. Set small obtainable goals.

I hope there is something in that you can use.

Much love dear Lori. Jehovah loves you and needs your efforts to prove Satan a liar. You have got this!


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[Lori]

37 minutes ago, FionaM said:

Lori, I feel for you. You sound like you have alot going on.
May I ask what you think a study will do?
You already know it's the truth.
I'm wondering if it's really a study you need??
Encouragement or support would be better maybe?
Perhaps ask a couple in your congregation if you can join in their family study once in a while, or ask a few families maybe?
From what you have said, I wouldn't think a study is needed either.
You have given many reasons why meeting attendance is a little lax at times, but when we feel something is important we make sure we are there. Do you miss work because of over sleeping, I telnet issues, or just for forgetting? See my point.
I wonder if you are an all or nothing person? You don't feel good enough until your doing EVERYTHING you should?

I might be totally wrong and if so please forgive me and only consider what you feel is right.

Maybe your expectations are a little high?

I would suggest you try and set small goals. Perhaps regular meeting attendance. (As you would work).
And daily bible reading. And meditation. Make those your priority for a month. Then next month add to that another small goal, maybe weekly watchtower preparation.

I just wonder if your struggling and taking on too much at once. Small steps.

As regards to prayer. Your father wants to hear how your feeling. Maybe just set an alarm for even just once a day to start and no matter what when your alarm goes, you just go talk to him, even about mundane things.
You are beyond the "milk" stage of the truth. Other in the Cong can definitely encourage, seek those ones out, but they cannot carry you. And you will enjoy the truth far more, the more effort you put into it.
But don't expect you can do it all when your struggling. Set small obtainable goals.

I hope there is something in that you can use.

Much love dear Lori. Jehovah loves you and needs your efforts to prove Satan a liar. You have got this!


Sent from my SM-A336E using Tapatalk
 

 

I feel like if I had a study it would help me mentally and emotionally, because I'm about ready to leave the truth.   To stop attending meetings because I am so depressed. 

 

I know that Jehovah wants to hear from me,  but I am so depressed and feeling like I'd be better off dead than to continue living..... 

 

I give up...  What's the use in trying to explain how I feel?  

 

I am so frustrated that no one understands how I feel or where I'm coming from . 

 

Never mind. I won't have a study.  I'll just fade away like I did before. If I make it to the new system than I do.  If not, Jehovah will destroy and I won't suffer anymore.

 

Thanks for the comments.  

Have a good day.   

 

 

[Mike047]

Lori, You may feel all alone, but God sees what you are going through. He cares about you—even if you have lost your will to live. “A heart broken and crushed, O God, you will not reject,” (Ps51:17). God wants you to live because he loves you. He invites you to tell him openly and honestly about whatever weighs on your mind, even though we, your brothers and sisters, respond to problems as humans, he responds as The Almighty. He can give you both inner peace and the strength to keep going.

 

Pray to God today. Use his name, Jehovah, and pour out your heart to him. Tell him about your feelings. Ask him to help you keep going. Your emotions go up and down into an abyss of feelings, but his spirit can stabilize you, can infuse power into you.

 

A brother I knew some years back had thoughts about ending his life and stopping the emotional pain that he was going through. He felt he had nothing to live for and no-one to talk to about it. His one joy was caring for his dog, taking it out for walks, and even talking to it about his pain and his fears. The dog simply sat and looked at him with those big eyes that some dogs have and, gradually, he came through this deep valley of self doubt, fear and personal disappointment.

 

Some of us knew of his pain, but we could not feel it. We were always nearby, and we prayed for him, but it was his dog, and his fundamental love for him, that brought him back to Jehovah, and his people. Is there anything still in your life that acts as an anchor?

 

Please relook at some bible verses, like these, and may they give you solace and comfort:

 

Ps 34:18 - Jehovah is close to the brokenhearted; He saves those who are crushed in spirit

 

Ps 94:19 - When anxieties overwhelmed me, You comforted and soothed me

 

Ps 103:12-14 - As far off as the sunrise is from the sunset, So far off from us he has put our transgressions. As a father shows mercy to his sons, Jehovah has shown mercy to those who fear him. For he well knows how we are formed, Remembering that we are dust.

 

Nobody should go through what you are going through, but may something we say help in a small way to remind you that you are much loved in this worldwide congregation forum. 

[FionaM]

Sis, you won't learn anything in a study.
You need to work on your relationship with Jehovah. To make his heart happy.
I know that seems an impossibility when depressed.
I know this from experience.
I have also been severely depressed. And suffered panic attacks as well as agoraphobia and PTSD. So I do speak from my own experience. Even though I don't know exactly how you feel, I have a good idea.
We cannot allow Satan's system to control our relationship with Jehovah. That's the whole point of sovereignty.
We are however imperfect and only human. Jehovah 100% understands how you feel. Life is hard in this system, Satan makes sure of that. But it's the little things.
One thing I have learned in all my imperfections is that I actually have more control over things than I thought I did.
And Jehovah and his organization do have the answers, but it's up to me to apply them. That's the hard part.
Have you sought help for your depression? Professional help I mean?
Medications? Just like there is help for depression the majority of the work has to come from you to improve. Mental health experts will lead with, sun (20-30 min a day) exposure. Exercise daily. Diet (healthy). And Jehovah also says , there is more happiness in giving than in receiving. If you visited an older one, with flowers or a cake, 100% guarantee you will feel much better after the visit.
Instead of saying you will just fade away from the truth, think that thought through. Will you be happy? Were you happy before?
The truth is we only get out of things the effort we put into it.
Work on your depression, again in small goals. Do the recommended.
Again from experience, it's worth the hard work. It builds coping skills for later and it makes like alot happier in the long run.

Am I free from depression, no, it's a daily fight, but I rely on Jehovah more now. I have alot less panic attacks now as I have learned what triggers them as well as how to cope with them. I would say my agoraphobia is 99% cured except when I'm peopled out and I'm at breaking point. But I can walk into a hall now without a breakdown so life is alot better.
But it only started to improve when I took control, and stopped letting my illnesses effect my relationship with Jehovah.

I hope and pray you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. It can be a long tunnel at times, but with effort you can do it.

Sent from my SM-A336E using Tapatalk

[ChrisW]

Hi hun.  Is this depression something that you take medication for? If so maybe you need to have it adjusted.  I've experienced what you're going through.... you sound like you need support and encouragement and there is nothing wrong with asking for that.  We are a family and we have a responsibility to each other. Jehovah our father of course sees you and wants to help. But you saw the need to ask for help. How wonderful ❤️ even though you are struggling you are trying to do something about it.  Don't give up sis.  Satan is wanting you to throw up your hands and say "I'm done". Keep pushing, muscles are strengthen a lil at a time so keep going.  I see strength in you sis. Don't try and lift heavy weights a lil bit at a time. 

[Amygdala]

Dearest Lori,

 

It is not wrong to reach out for help when you need it, especially spiritually. Your heavenly father cares deeply about all of his sheep, and you bet you are just as important and included!

 

Remember that God does no‘t keep account of your sins in the past… Ok. Relief, breathe. Now what you are trying to do going forward is to avoid making the same mistakes by looking at what caused you to fall away in the first place, namely your study habits, not going in the service, not praying - and that is really commendable that you saw what led to you falling away. 

 

I really like already the suggestion here to start small. Can you do that?

 

Sometimes when a person goes through depression, isn‘t it the case that there‘s this give it your all, you have to be on top of the world, have to show everyone that you are doing not just your best, but 110% your very best? But then when it‘s not achievable, you fall into a deep pit of a hole, and feel like doing nothing? That’s an “all or nothing“ view. How about trying to just be in-between?

 

If a person was missing a leg, would you expect them to join a marathon with everybody else going at their pace? You suffer from depression, so don‘t feel like you need to always be 100%. Pray for wisdom and understanding on how you can stay afloat and faithful, so that you can feel joy in your life. Ask yourself, how can I get or feel Jehovah‘s joy in my life? What are some things you can do when you are feeling down? Maybe it‘s sleep, maybe it‘s taking something for your symptoms, maybe it‘s hunger, maybe it‘s physical symptoms that a doctor needs to have a good look at.

 

What some may choose to do is just watch a video.

 

When you go to jw.org, type in “Depression“ in the search field. Then select the tab “Videos“. Binge watch some of those videos. Feel Jehovah‘s love through them. Then… if you feel a little bit better, read an article from jw.org on the subject. Spend your time feeling that comfort Jehovah promises to give.

 

Are you needing a friend? Is this why you would like a personal study? Tell the elders that. Maybe a pioneer sister can help you with how you can achieve these little goals to stay in the middle of Jehovah‘s net, and not outside of it. Cause it‘s really empty and sad out there.

 

What do you think? Don‘t get discouraged if another solution comes your way that you didn‘t expect, because that might end up being the help and support that you need. Jehovah wants to care for his sheep, but you have to let him do that in the way he knows what is best for you. Ps.55:22.

 

VIDEOS

 

 

 

 

Edited July 2 by Amygdala

[Dages]

It's not a mistake to ask for a "study"... It's not about learning anything "new", it's about getting food regularly.
Some issues may make a person stop eating, so help could be provided so this person gets the habits back. Simple analogy.

 

Discuss it with elders, with friends you trust, with your health care provider, and above all with Jehovah.

 

[Tsheppar]

Hi sister Lori, man o man  Im sorry for the mental fight you have to struggle with. For some just being a witness is easy , for others its hard. But even if your  on zoom...your keeping up the fight. I too deal with panic attacks. One time i read a self help book for myself , and it mentioned writing your feelings on paper. Paper. All of them the good the bad the ugly. Unleash. Oddly it did seem  to help me.The motion  of handwriting and feelings. I dont know why.

 I added another step I made up . Lol i then  folded up those feelings written  on paper and I went and  found a rock and said here rock. You have these, i cant handle  them. i put the paper with all my negative  feelings under the rock and left it . . Hahhaha

  Anyways, even if you struggle to pray. We on here can ! I already mentioned you by name, and I know others will too ! 

  Thank you for sharing your struggle . 

I struggle with association. I dont like it. Meetings are hard for me too. 

    Keep up the fight sister! 

        Love - Tom 

[Dhanyel]

1 hour ago, FionaM said:

Sis, you won't learn anything in a study.
You need to work on your relationship with Jehovah. To make his heart happy.
I know that seems an impossibility when depressed.
I know this from experience.
I have also been severely depressed. And suffered panic attacks as well as agoraphobia and PTSD. So I do speak from my own experience. Even though I don't know exactly how you feel, I have a good idea.
We cannot allow Satan's system to control our relationship with Jehovah. That's the whole point of sovereignty.
We are however imperfect and only human. Jehovah 100% understands how you feel. Life is hard in this system, Satan makes sure of that. But it's the little things.
One thing I have learned in all my imperfections is that I actually have more control over things than I thought I did.
And Jehovah and his organization do have the answers, but it's up to me to apply them. That's the hard part.
Have you sought help for your depression? Professional help I mean?
Medications? Just like there is help for depression the majority of the work has to come from you to improve. Mental health experts will lead with, sun (20-30 min a day) exposure. Exercise daily. Diet (healthy). And Jehovah also says , there is more happiness in giving than in receiving. If you visited an older one, with flowers or a cake, 100% guarantee you will feel much better after the visit.
Instead of saying you will just fade away from the truth, think that thought through. Will you be happy? Were you happy before?
The truth is we only get out of things the effort we put into it.
Work on your depression, again in small goals. Do the recommended.
Again from experience, it's worth the hard work. It builds coping skills for later and it makes like alot happier in the long run.

Am I free from depression, no, it's a daily fight, but I rely on Jehovah more now. I have alot less panic attacks now as I have learned what triggers them as well as how to cope with them. I would say my agoraphobia is 99% cured except when I'm peopled out and I'm at breaking point. But I can walk into a hall now without a breakdown so life is alot better.
But it only started to improve when I took control, and stopped letting my illnesses effect my relationship with Jehovah.

I hope and pray you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. It can be a long tunnel at times, but with effort you can do it.

Sent from my SM-A336E using Tapatalk
 

We always have something to learn in a Bible study!

[Dhanyel]

3 hours ago, Lori said:

Not many of you know that I was disfellowshipped back in 2003,  and came back to the meetings almost immediately.  I was reinstated in 2005ish...  

I stopped coming to the meetings for a while,  because I was really depressed,  suicidal even...     I've been regularly attending meetings since  2018 on Zoom.   

 

Before I was very inactive.   I didn't participate in the ministry.     

 

Fast forward to 2024,  I still attend meetings, but sometimes I miss some due to oversleeping, internet issues, or just forgetting.   I am struggling EVERY DAY to remain in the Truth.    I have severe depression again,  horrible anxiety and panic attacks.   I have trouble even studying for the meetings and about 70% I don't study for the meetings.  I have a hard time paying attention during the meetings.    (There are some feelings of not belonging with the current congregation.  Long story)     I'm having a VERY hard time praying.  I barely pray anymore.   

I've seen this before with myself...  I become inactive and stop going to the meetings.   And I DO NOT want to do that again. 

 

I asked a dear sister that I've known almost 29 years if she'd do a study with me.   She said that she would, but she's in another congregation.   (We are very close and I feel comfortable with her. So I feel like I would get more out of the study).   Anyways... I sent a text to one of the Elders of my congregation and asked about getting a study.    I just feel like I need to focus on my spirituality and I can't do it alone.    I just feel like he doesn't think that I need a study.         To me,  this is a cry for help for me.    I never reached out before.   

 

I can't go on how I'm feeling or how I'm neglecting my spirituality.   

 

I'm going to fall into being inactive or even leave again. 

 

I don't know what to do. 

 

Please help me. 

You are not alone, Jehovah will help you, follow the advice presented here, and if you want to study again, ask an elder in the congregation, do this and you will feel better. Medical help is also important. Let's pray for you 

[Áine]

6 hours ago, Lori said:

Not many of you know that I was disfellowshipped back in 2003,  and came back to the meetings almost immediately.  I was reinstated in 2005ish...  

I stopped coming to the meetings for a while,  because I was really depressed,  suicidal even...     I've been regularly attending meetings since  2018 on Zoom.   

 

Before I was very inactive.   I didn't participate in the ministry.     

 

Fast forward to 2024,  I still attend meetings, but sometimes I miss some due to oversleeping, internet issues, or just forgetting.   I am struggling EVERY DAY to remain in the Truth.    I have severe depression again,  horrible anxiety and panic attacks.   I have trouble even studying for the meetings and about 70% I don't study for the meetings.  I have a hard time paying attention during the meetings.    (There are some feelings of not belonging with the current congregation.  Long story)     I'm having a VERY hard time praying.  I barely pray anymore.   

I've seen this before with myself...  I become inactive and stop going to the meetings.   And I DO NOT want to do that again. 

 

I asked a dear sister that I've known almost 29 years if she'd do a study with me.   She said that she would, but she's in another congregation.   (We are very close and I feel comfortable with her. So I feel like I would get more out of the study).   Anyways... I sent a text to one of the Elders of my congregation and asked about getting a study.    I just feel like I need to focus on my spirituality and I can't do it alone.    I just feel like he doesn't think that I need a study.         To me,  this is a cry for help for me.    I never reached out before.   

 

I can't go on how I'm feeling or how I'm neglecting my spirituality.   

 

I'm going to fall into being inactive or even leave again. 

 

I don't know what to do. 

 

Please help me. 

Lori… I was DF as well, many years ago and I can honestly tell you that I struggle daily… literally daily.

 

 My heart goes out to you and I fully understand why you feel like you need to have a study again, I think you would benefit from that one to one closeness with the sister that you know very well and at the same time you would also be drawing close to Jehovah

 

 please just take a deep breath, close your eyes and have a really good cry to Jehovah… he knows your problems before you even tell him and he’s wanting to have that conversation with you

 

 I know that I’m in another country but I’m here if you want to talk, if you want to chat then message me privately and I can give you my phone number x

[Ishaya]

@Lori,I think you need the Bible study,

 

When would you like to start please?

 

Im sure that with the help of the moderators and the brothers and sisters here we can be able to get across to your congregation elders,its not a difficult thing to do.

 

Can you please let us know when you'd like to start the Bible studies.

[Witness1970]

There is nothing wrong with asking for help.  The problem is that most of us hate to ask for help.  It's just a common tendency we all have.

 

 

[Ostria]

Lori, if you ever come back, i saw your status thing. If you want we can team up and do the weekly bible studies together. I have a hard time remaining focus to do them from time to time. Perhaps we can help each other. Dont run away from Jehovah, the real world is much more scary now than it has been in the past. Ive also dealt witb depression and suicidal tendencies (including a failed attempt in 2019). Please stay strong!

[Ishaya]

4 hours ago, Witness1970 said:

There is nothing wrong with asking for help.  The problem is that most of us hate to ask for help.  It's just a common tendency we all have.

 

 

 

I think 🤔 

Isolation is the greatest risk factor for developing depression.

 

A lot of medical and anxiety problems and even spiritual problems can quickly arise when someone is isolated.

 

Jehovah's witnesses are social people because of the nature of our field ministry,

Our field ministry gives us so much to do outdoors,which is very helpful to our mental health.

 

In the congregation we need to widen out and make a lot of christian friends (not just one or two but a lot of christian friends).

 

 

Unfortunately,people who are introverted are at higher risk of coming down with depression because they don't mingle with people,so they are mostly isolating themselves.

It is not a helpful condition to be introverted,it's not something to be comfortable with.

it s necessary to make effort to breakfree from that by widening out in our friendship and spending more time in the field service.

 

Extroverted people deal with disappointments much better.

 

 

[SKnight]

Love you❣️ @Lori

Remember., you are not alone in your struggles and the way you feel. We’re all trying to figure this thing out and survive this dark and lawless world. Pray to the Father of tender mercies. Keep in mind: “Shining through the darkness, ours is a message so bright., It offers hope and light. Sparkling like the daylight, bringing tomorrow in sight—So ends the night.”

🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

[Alana]

My dear sister Lori, I feel for you because a lot of me I see in you. I have severe depression, panic attacks and widespread pain daily. I am a brittle type 1 diabetic which causes many health and emotional problems. I have contemplated taking my own life, but I realized that,  sure it would end all my pain but it would leave my family and friends behind grieving my loss. So ultimately they would be the ones suffering, especially my children and grandchildren. It certainly would not be fair to them. I have seen what it does to people who have went through the loss of a loved one who took their own lives. Believe me it is not a pretty sight.

 

I had a real bad panic attack the other day and I called up an elder who I am close to and asked him to pray with me over the phone, so he did and it was so comforting to see Jehovah at work after the prayer. I felt so calm and at peace after he said prayer.

 

I needed to ask for help one time because I couldn't do it alone and Jehovah knew it. He was there at my lowest each and every time. I realize that when push come to shove the only one who could help me was Jehovah because he loves me more than anyone else in the world. He uses our brothers and sisters to help us when we need it. If we trust in Jehovah he will be there everytime.

 

One time I was so spiritually sick I asked for a study too because I felt I could no longer go it alone. I needed guidence and reminders. I felt like I knew very little about the Bible and the truth even though I had been in the truth for many years. I studied until I was confident in my abilities to manage my spiritual routine and had confidence in myself.

The sister who I studied with could bring me to the scriptures that would pertain to me and my situation. I truly believe the scriptures she shared with me was Jehovah saying my child this one is meant for you. Each and every scripture.

 

I am under Dr's. care for mental and physical ailments. I take medications that help me even though at times they need to be adjusted. 

 

My favorite scripture is John 15:16 where it says I chose you, you did not choose me. So if I was that important to Jehovah that he chose me out of thousands in the world then I need to appreciate him to the highest degree possible.

 

He loves me and I know he loves you too. I wish I could give you a big hug and tell you that it will work out because I have faith in you and I know Jehovah has faith in you also. He loves you and does not desire anything bad for you. He wants you to be happy and healthy, enjoying life to the fullest. Jehovah says, Lori trust in me because I can cause miracles. Prov 3:5,6 Trust in Jehovah not in yourself because he has perfect thinking and you have imperfect thinking.

Don't be afraid to reach out for help because you deserve the best. 

You have many brothers and sisters praying for you right now so let that be a comfort to you. May Jehovah bless you.

Love and prayers, 

from your sister Alana

 

[Witness1970]

14 hours ago, Ishaya said:

 

I think 🤔 

Isolation is the greatest risk factor for developing depression.

 

A lot of medical and anxiety problems and even spiritual problems can quickly arise when someone is isolated.

 

Jehovah's witnesses are social people because of the nature of our field ministry,

Our field ministry gives us so much to do outdoors,which is very helpful to our mental health.

 

In the congregation we need to widen out and make a lot of christian friends (not just one or two but a lot of christian friends).

 

 

Unfortunately,people who are introverted are at higher risk of coming down with depression because they don't mingle with people,so they are mostly isolating themselves.

It is not a helpful condition to be introverted,it's not something to be comfortable with.

it s necessary to make effort to breakfree from that by widening out in our friendship and spending more time in the field service.

 

Extroverted people deal with disappointments much better.

 

 

I am an introvert.  I need to be alone sometimes. But at Assemblies and Conventions, I used to walk around during lunch and see how many people I could find to talk to.  Introverted does not have to mean antisocial.

[Amygdala]

 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_uNeQmQmBY&list=RDC_uNeQmQmBY&start_radio=1

[Ishaya]

8 hours ago, Witness1970 said:

I am an introvert.  I need to be alone sometimes. But at Assemblies and Conventions, I used to walk around during lunch and see how many people I could find to talk to. Introverted does not have to mean antisocial.

 

Extroverts are not always spending time with people either, sometimes they enjoy being alone too,which is okay.

 

The problem with introvertedness is that someone doesn't enjoy the company of people very much,

So there is actually a close similarity between being introverted and being antisocial or nonsocial which is really not a helpful thing.

 

You're probably not introverted as much as you think,maybe you are just balanced,somewhere in-between which is also okay.

 

Jesus spend alot of time with people,it is either with his disciples or with the multitude,but he also has time he spends alone for his prayers,thats balance really.

 

[truce]

On 7/2/2024 at 10:07 AM, Lori said:

Not many of you know that I was disfellowshipped back in 2003,  and came back to the meetings almost immediately.  I was reinstated in 2005ish...  

I stopped coming to the meetings for a while,  because I was really depressed,  suicidal even...     I've been regularly attending meetings since  2018 on Zoom.   

 

Before I was very inactive.   I didn't participate in the ministry.     

 

Fast forward to 2024,  I still attend meetings, but sometimes I miss some due to oversleeping, internet issues, or just forgetting.   I am struggling EVERY DAY to remain in the Truth.    I have severe depression again,  horrible anxiety and panic attacks.   I have trouble even studying for the meetings and about 70% I don't study for the meetings.  I have a hard time paying attention during the meetings.    (There are some feelings of not belonging with the current congregation.  Long story)     I'm having a VERY hard time praying.  I barely pray anymore.   

I've seen this before with myself...  I become inactive and stop going to the meetings.   And I DO NOT want to do that again. 

 

I asked a dear sister that I've known almost 29 years if she'd do a study with me.   She said that she would, but she's in another congregation.   (We are very close and I feel comfortable with her. So I feel like I would get more out of the study).   Anyways... I sent a text to one of the Elders of my congregation and asked about getting a study.    I just feel like I need to focus on my spirituality and I can't do it alone.    I just feel like he doesn't think that I need a study.         To me,  this is a cry for help for me.    I never reached out before.   

 

I can't go on how I'm feeling or how I'm neglecting my spirituality.   

 

I'm going to fall into being inactive or even leave again. 

 

I don't know what to do. 

 

Please help me. 

Just know that I love you because I can relate to everything you said.... everything. 

[hatcheckgirl]

Dearest Lori,

 

If you need to take a break, I understand.  If it's all too much, that's not something that is your fault. All of us here love you and are praying for you, Lori.  You will be welcomed back anytime. Keep praying and stay close to Jehovah, dear sis 💖

[Lori]

On 7/2/2024 at 6:06 AM, FionaM said:

Sis, you won't learn anything in a study.
You need to work on your relationship with Jehovah. To make his heart happy.
I know that seems an impossibility when depressed.
I know this from experience.
I have also been severely depressed. And suffered panic attacks as well as agoraphobia and PTSD. So I do speak from my own experience. Even though I don't know exactly how you feel, I have a good idea.
We cannot allow Satan's system to control our relationship with Jehovah. That's the whole point of sovereignty.
We are however imperfect and only human. Jehovah 100% understands how you feel. Life is hard in this system, Satan makes sure of that. But it's the little things.
One thing I have learned in all my imperfections is that I actually have more control over things than I thought I did.
And Jehovah and his organization do have the answers, but it's up to me to apply them. That's the hard part.
Have you sought help for your depression? Professional help I mean?
Medications? Just like there is help for depression the majority of the work has to come from you to improve. Mental health experts will lead with, sun (20-30 min a day) exposure. Exercise daily. Diet (healthy). And Jehovah also says , there is more happiness in giving than in receiving. If you visited an older one, with flowers or a cake, 100% guarantee you will feel much better after the visit.
Instead of saying you will just fade away from the truth, think that thought through. Will you be happy? Were you happy before?
The truth is we only get out of things the effort we put into it.
Work on your depression, again in small goals. Do the recommended.
Again from experience, it's worth the hard work. It builds coping skills for later and it makes like alot happier in the long run.

Am I free from depression, no, it's a daily fight, but I rely on Jehovah more now. I have alot less panic attacks now as I have learned what triggers them as well as how to cope with them. I would say my agoraphobia is 99% cured except when I'm peopled out and I'm at breaking point. But I can walk into a hall now without a breakdown so life is alot better.
But it only started to improve when I took control, and stopped letting my illnesses effect my relationship with Jehovah.

I hope and pray you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. It can be a long tunnel at times, but with effort you can do it.

Sent from my SM-A336E using Tapatalk
 

How can I work on my relationship with Jehovah if I'm so foggy brained,  severely depressed that I don't even want to get out of bed?  

You don't understand how my brain works. 

I'm sorry, sis, but your response to me sounds judgemental.   Like I'm not trying hard enough.    Every day is a battle.   You don't know HALF of what I've been through in the last 50 years of my life.  (I'm 59).     I've been through things that should have shattered me and they almost have.   I've hurt myself in the past.   I've tried to kill myself in the past.     

[Lori]

On 7/2/2024 at 7:38 AM, Dages said:

It's not a mistake to ask for a "study"... It's not about learning anything "new", it's about getting food regularly.
Some issues may make a person stop eating, so help could be provided so this person gets the habits back. Simple analogy.

 

Discuss it with elders, with friends you trust, with your health care provider, and above all with Jehovah.

 

 

I cried reading this.    THANK YOU!!  Someone who understands me!!!!!!!!!!!