Chinese gender calendars

[Bec C]

Sorry if this is the wrong section.

We are thinking of trying again for another baby after losing our daughter last july, its been a yr wednesday so we now feel like we would like to try again. If Im truly honest I would like to try for a girl, but as long as it is safe and well I really dont mind. I have read about using chinese gender calendars and how they can tell you when to concieve for a girl. Are these wrong does anyone know? I don't know if its like a fortune telling thing or if they are based on some kind of fact. Also they say sometimes concieving on a new moon or something helps, is this wrong or scientific? I would hate to look it up and displease Jehovah.

I am praying to Jehovah for help but I can't ask him for a specific baby, I guess I am trying to sway things myself and pray.

But ultimately as long as I have a live baby I dont really mind, I guess a girl would be nice and in all honesty I would prefer it, plus it would be easier bedroom wise with my 2 children here.

Sorry I am waffling aren't I. I can't find any info on these calendars so I thought I would ask on here before I route any further on line into these methods.

Thanks yo bros and sis xx

[Greenfield]

Sorry to hear about the loss of your baby. I am sure Jehovah has been and will be with you in helping you to cope.

I did a little research and quite frankly the Chinese gender calendar does not seem to have any basis in fact. It will of course be right about 50% of the time - but that is the same probability as flipping a coin. One website had a poll as to whether or not the calendar was right, and of those who knew one way or the other, the majority actually said it was wrong!

Likewise, another article states:

"But those claims may have just been debunked: Researchers at the University of Michigan, who tracked more than 2.8 million Swedish births over 34 years, found that the ancient chart “is no better to predict the sex of the baby than tossing a coin,” say the authors. Yup, it was correct only 50 percent of the time."

[Mrs. Musky]

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your little girl last year.

After I read your post I just quickly googled the subject of increasing your chances of conceiving a girl. There's lots of info on the internet (no surprise there). For instance, I found 2 sites that discussed this but I'm sure there are many more:

http://www.justmommies.com/articles/conceive-a-girl.shtml

http://www.babyhopes.com/articles/how-to-conceive-a-girl.html

I hope this is helpful. It's like they say: "Timing is everything!" Wouldn't it be lovely to conceive a little girl? But I know you'll be happy either way.

[Bec C]

Thank you so much for taking the time to look. I will have a look at all those links. I guess the calendar did sound a bit too good to be true. I couldn't work out if it was wrong, as sometimes chinese things can be about luck and fortune can't they.

I have said to Jehovah I leave it with him, he knows the stream of time we are in and he knows if I can cope in the end with a baby also. He has been with us every step of the way since last yr I have felt him there comforting and suppporting us so I know he will guide me now. He really is the God of all comfort and I know what ever else we have to face in the future he will be there holding our hands through it all.

Ok I'm off to look at those links. I will keep you all posted

[surfergirl]

Dear Bec. I am sorry for your lose. Its note easy.

On thing. When i had lost my girl. I really. Really poured out my heart to Jehovah. I was blessed. With 2 monde girls and a boy. Todays watchtower. Proverbs 3:5.6 trust : completely in JEHOVAH.hé Will provide. Hé Will give a new baby.beg Jehovah Bec. May hé be with you & tour family. Agape xoxo

[nikviz]

Though personally not make a comment for personal decision. But just before a month you had started a topic for divorce. Generally, many couples believe that a child will fix some problems. Without wishing to intervene in your personal life. Should you think again the pregnancy?

[pinkpopcorn]

I have heard that since female sperm like acidic rather than akaline surroundings, douching with apple cider vinegar/water combination prior to intercourse makes for a better chance of conceiving a girl.

[campanula]

Though personally not make a comment for personal decision. But just before a month you had started a topic for divorce. Generally' date=' many couples believe that a child will fix some problems. Without wishing to intervene in your personal life. Should you think again the pregnancy?[/quote']

[surfergirl]

Brother Nikviz, without me getting to involved..May I say..when you lose a baby..Its such a nightmare...you think as time goes by you will heal but It is very very hard especially when you step out into the world you hear babies cry, some look like your own, It hurts to be in public,to work is hard, life to carry on is very hard, You think after awhile It gets easier, The only Way I Know that can fix the pain without replacing the one you lost.

Is to have another Baby..I knew back in 2002 after having said the biggest prayer to Jehovah..WIth trying to deal with lose..I had a big calm over me, Then when I found Out I was pregnant again wow, The excitement emotions is hard.. I have a friend she has had many miscarriages and I am not being sexes here, but she said her hubby didn't give her enough support and comfort and some men are like that. Have no understanding. Its probably not easy for a guy either..It has taken me and my hubby a lot of help from Elders and support..To get through this situation..

After my I had my last baby..I suppose it was stress and a mixture of Beer, My hubby told me he HATED ME..WIsh I never had him and a lot of bad stuff happened..Now My Hubby loves him..It takes a lot of time..Divorce comes up when under pressure and you feel your world has slipped away, NOw for me it is 10yrs since my Jade..But having had 3 more children definetly fills in the empty hole. of losing one. agape`

[Musky]

Brother Nikviz, without me getting to involved..May I say..when you lose a baby..Its such a nightmare...you think as time goes by you will heal but It is very very hard especially when you step out into the world you hear babies cry, some look like your own, It hurts to be in public,to work is hard, life to carry on is very hard, You think after awhile It gets easier, The only Way I Know that can fix the pain without replacing the one you lost.

Is to have another Baby..I knew back in 2002 after having said the biggest prayer to Jehovah..WIth trying to deal with lose..I had a big calm over me, Then when I found Out I was pregnant again wow, The excitement emotions is hard.. I have a friend she has had many miscarriages and I am not being sexes here, but she said her hubby didn't give her enough support and comfort and some men are like that. Have no understanding. Its probably not easy for a guy either..It has taken me and my hubby a lot of help from Elders and support..To get through this situation..

After my I had my last baby..I suppose it was stress and a mixture of Beer, My hubby told me he HATED ME..WIsh I never had him and a lot of bad stuff happened..Now My Hubby loves him..It takes a lot of time..Divorce comes up when under pressure and you feel your world has slipped away, NOw for me it is 10yrs since my Jade..But having had 3 more children definetly fills in the empty hole. of losing one. agape`

While this was your own personal experience, you missed the point that Nikos was making, which was a very valid one.

[campanula]

The only Way I Know that can fix the pain without replacing the one you lost.

Is to have another Baby.

Another way is to ask for a medical help, maybe talk to psychologist or even psychiatrist.

Sorry, but you can't replace one child/person with another one.

IMHO

[surfergirl]

The only Way I Know that can fix the pain without replacing the one you lost.

Is to have another Baby.

Another way is to ask for a medical help, maybe talk to psychologist or even psychiatrist.

Sorry, but you can't replace one child/person with another one.

I understand & agréé you cannot replace one. Child mot saying that. But having another.

Does help as having been there.

Thats my final thought 4 this subject

[nikviz]

To lose a child is real shocking. It is truth does not lost a child, however I can only imagine how it is. When Adsalom died David cry and said; “My son Ab′sa·lom, my son, my son Ab′sa·lom! O that I might have died, I myself, instead of you, Ab′sa·lom my son, my son!” (2 Samuel 18:33)

Thanks God we have a hope and consolation that Jehovah is near to those who have broken heart  "Jehovah is near to those that are broken at heart; And those who are crushed in spirit he saves."(Psalm 34:18)

I believe that those who participate in this forum we are brothers and friends. Good friends are in the joys and in the sorrows together. We will all be there to rejoice with you when at the resurrection hugging your daughter.

[Bec C]

HI Yes I understand how this all looks looking at my last thread. I think my depression does not help my feelings and sometimes I feel I have no feelings full stop. We have had a rough time. The convention helped us so much and although our marriage isn't perfect I am determined not to give up. I'd really like to keep trying and improve things.

Losing the baby put a huge strain on things for us, we both grieve so differently sometime we felt as though we didn't know ourselves let alone each other.

I understand completely what gabe is saying, and in all honesty I don't think you can understand unless you have been through it. You have such a void in your life that, I would say 75% of people if not more, fill, with having another child, it most certainly is not to replace that lost child, to suggest such a thing would show ignorance. No way can you replace that child with 100 others. Another child simply fills a void, an emprtiness and sadness that is surrounding and consuming you. I am not trying to replace my baby nor does anyone else, but I do have a strong urge to have another, our family will never be complete this side of armageddon, I know that. It doesn't however mean you cannot have more children and try to carry on in this system to best of your ability.

Thank you Gabe I do pray I am leaving it in Jehovahs hands to guide me in the way to go. I am learning patience everyday, hard as it is, I do hope he will bless me with another baby one day soon. Maybe more if he sees fit.

[Cool Cat]

If Im truly honest I would like to try for a girl, but as long as it is safe and well I really dont mind. I have read about using chinese gender calendars and how they can tell you when to concieve for a girl.

There is no way to guarantee the sex of the baby but i have heard that timing helps. My reflexologist (Chinese method) has advised people when to try for a particular sex. I am not sure how she can tell this though as i have never asked.

A 2 minute search brought up this:-

The boy sperm have a shorter life span and swims fast, so, if a couple is intimate right at the time of ovulation [when the egg comes out to play ;) ], the chances are that they will conceive the same day. The sperm that will make it to the egg is going to be a fast swimmer with a short life span [male sperm], giving the couple 80-90% chance of conceiving a boy.

The girl sperm lives longer and swim a bit slower–ladies, you have always been survivors!–so, if a woman knows her normal ovulation day, and wants a girl, it is more optimal for the couple to have intimacy a day or two before ovulation and then let the nature take its course. The boy sperm won’t make it that long [sorry, fellows!], but the girl sperm will be hanging out, getting stronger, waiting for their lady-friend [the egg], and when she comes out they will have a party. Under these circumstances there is an 80-90% chance of the couple having a girl.

[Bec C]

As noone has said no about the chinese calendar I'm guessing its ok then for me to look at for a bit of fun.

[retroHelen]

I can't see how Chinese calendars can be of help. If they were true, then how come so many millions of Chinese babies are aborted every year, many because they are the wrong gender and many thousands are neglected in Chinese orphanages because they were the wrong gender for those who wanted a son in their 'one-child per family policy' society and girls are not as regarded?