Help! Garden. Husband. Way different opinions

[Miss Bea]

We have a vegetable garden. I grow house plant. Nice ones. Have for years. We plant a garden every year. I feel, water as needed, but not overly so. Plants are like people. Provide them with everything, and then some, they do not reach out and develop for themselves, root wise. They do not develop properly.

My husband, the perfectionist, wants to provide them with everything. And then something. He anticipates their needs. in his opinion. The soil is always soggy. Always. I keep telling him they will develop gills. It is easier for me to cooperate. We have lost two to root rot.

Next year, he has announced we will have his and hers garden plants. I have always enjoyed gardening, now if a plant looks pathetic, I fell like sitting down, and having a heart to heart with it. Well, heart to chlorophyll. Is there a way to handle this, and have the garden survive?

[Lance]

Bea...

Sharp sand.. Drainage... I used to look after 45 acres of vegetables .. Over time I got know what area was good for certain vegetables and they prospered if I paid attention to their needs.. Think of the process this way

1) soil is basically the anchor and a hanger for the root system..

2) the root system of plants need air.. Water.. Dissolved nutrients..

3) the soil is like a matrix spider web that allows the free flow of air and water..and keeps the roots system at a certain humidity..this is needed not only for the root system but also for the essential bacteria in the soil...the bacteria breaks down organic material so the plant can use it...other bacteria can fixate nitrogen.. and this can be used later by the plants... There is a whole complex Eco system taking place in area of the root system

So that is essential for all plants...

4) every plant has an ideal humidity,nutrient and ph requirement...and certain stress tolerance.

5) too much water causes can cause stress too little water can cause stress .. It is the Goldilocks principle ... Just right..

Better to give a thorough deep watering and then let it dry out to a certain extent.. You can dig down and feel the relative humidity in the soil..it is just a feel you can develop...

6) depending what your growing some times you need to induce stress to make certain plants flower... It's an art..

7) peppers tomatoes potatoes all members of the tomato/potato family like sandy loam and lots of warm air and warm feet... Swamp plants like celery need a lot more water to keep happy..

8) so when you water.. The water goes down and it sucks the air with it.. Your just giving the roots a bath .. Not a drowning ... And yes it is ok to stress the plants a bit so they can reach for and expand their root ball

I hope that helps...

Lance

Edited July 2, 2013 by TheDoorGuy

[Julsey]

I think his and her gardens is a great idea!  You can see which of you can grow the healthiest plants!    

 

Me?  I used to be able to grow anything, but since we have been in The Woodlands, my green thumb has turned brown.  Can't get anything except lantana to grow.  Don't get me wrong:  I like lantana, but it's depressing how much money I have spent on plants that just haven't taken! 

[witness]

 

We have a vegetable garden. I grow house plant. Nice ones. Have for years. We plant a garden every year. I feel, water as needed, but not overly so. Plants are like people. Provide them with everything, and then some, they do not reach out and develop for themselves, root wise. They do not develop properly.
My husband, the perfectionist, wants to provide them with everything. And then something. He anticipates their needs. in his opinion. The soil is always soggy. Always. I keep telling him they will develop gills. It is easier for me to cooperate. We have lost two to root rot.
Next year, he has announced we will have his and hers garden plants. I have always enjoyed gardening, now if a plant looks pathetic, I fell like sitting down, and having a heart to heart with it. Well, heart to chlorophyll. Is there a way to handle this, and have the garden survive?

Have heart to heart talk to hubby??? If that don't work...plant hubby in deep soil & water, water, water, lol

Edited July 2, 2013 by trottigy

[GrumpysWife]

I am so gonna love you Carol from Nova Scotia.

[Lance]

Careful now .. You might get a big crop of "him"

They do multiply ... Careful what you "plant"

Lol

;)

[trottigy]

Careful now .. You might get a big crop of "him"

They do multiply ... Careful what you "plant"

Lol

;)

 

You will reap what you sow!! 

[surfergirl]

Miss Bea/ there is a couple in my cong. he is 80 and she is nearly there I love them both.

They are awesome Gardeners. he is dutch and she is Scottish. well its funny watching them.

He has one area thats his. He tends to it etc. She likes the old English cottage garden. There is room for both. She is not allowed to touch his. Nor he with her garden. She says in tonuge and cheek. He hates mine always so much work. But she has the easy maintained like Roses. etc. Lavender. Looks good anytime you go for a visit.

Maybe his and hers is a great way. Then you are both happy. Happy gardening    

[Dave]

Bea...

Sharp sand.. Drainage... I used to look after 45 acres of vegetables .. Over time I got know what area was good for certain vegetables and they prospered if I paid attention to their needs.. Think of the process this way

1) soil is basically the anchor and a hanger for the root system..

2) the root system of plants need air.. Water.. Dissolved nutrients..

3) the soil is like a matrix spider web that allows the free flow of air and water..and keeps the roots system at a certain humidity..this is needed not only for the root system but also for the essential bacteria in the soil...the bacteria breaks down organic material so the plant can use it...other bacteria can fixate nitrogen.. and this can be used later by the plants... There is a whole complex Eco system taking place in area of the root system

So that is essential for all plants...

4) every plant has an ideal humidity,nutrient and ph requirement...and certain stress tolerance.

5) too much water causes can cause stress too little water can cause stress .. It is the Goldilocks principle ... Just right..

Better to give a thorough deep watering and then let it dry out to a certain extent.. You can dig down and feel the relative humidity in the soil..it is just a feel you can develop...

6) depending what your growing some times you need to induce stress to make certain plants flower... It's an art..

7) peppers tomatoes potatoes all members of the tomato/potato family like sandy loam and lots of warm air and warm feet... Swamp plants like celery need a lot more water to keep happy..

8) so when you water.. The water goes down and it sucks the air with it.. Your just giving the roots a bath .. Not a drowning ... And yes it is ok to stress the plants a bit so they can reach for and expand their root ball

I hope that helps...

Lance

 

That's a very good explanation Lance. Thanks for that.

 

One thing's for certain. You never stop learning when it comes to the garden. You've just got to keep trying different things. My garden's surrounded by trees so I can plant the same thing in a different spot and it grows completely different. 

It's good to rotate your crops too, not growing in the same place all the time. If the soils too wet and boggy, drainage like Lance says is a good idea. Or you could try building a raised garden. The moisture naturally drains to the original ground level that way.

 

Happy Gardening.

[Miss Bea]

Thank you,thank you. Actually this year for the first time, it is a raised garden. I had to laugh. There was a container up there. It said bat guano. And it had directions. I asked husband about the square footage thing. He told me. I gave it thought, marched up there, dutifully dosed them up. Later I told him I have never seen bat guano that was white, but they have all been dosed. He thought for a second. "I think I reused that container. Maybe that was dolomite." Oh great. I've killed them off. They look okay. I've been giving the little dears a tea of, yes, bat guano, and Fox Farm fertilizer. Two tablespoons to a gallon of water, every other Sunday, after the meeting. I actually thought about sneaking Miracle Grow in there. That is what the commercial guy uses. He does fine. That is not organic, and will kill our earth worms, etc.

it is a no win battle for me. If I succeed, it is because I followed his orders. If I don't, it will be because I did not water properly. I personally think unless they are Water Lillie's, they do not need to be soggy, and i mean soggy, all the time. I went out in the ministry today, came home, ate, and prepared to, yes, water the garden. He already had, and gave me an Eeore answer. (Winnie the Poohs very negative donkey friend) when I asked him how it looked.

Actually, it is weird. We have had beautiful gardens in the past. Beautiful.

I think I have a clue. And he knows it. He is growing Indian tobacco up there too. I think I read somewhere that and tomatoes are mortal enemies. The less I know about why he grows it, the better off I am. It has to do with his, "Indian religion" he does not smoke, except, "ceremonially". But the stuff is a nasty weed. He has agreed to harvest it before it seeds and get it out of the garden. This year.

I like the, "three sisters" trio from long ago. Corn, squash and beans. I will try that next year, after he gets the toxic stuff out of there.

But it is sad. We figure out what we spend at the Miracle Grow Guys commercial garden, and buy away. Last year, it was soil amendments. Before that, it was a huge pile of sacks of chicken manure, every year. This year, it was actual good soil for those boxes he built. I am doing the feeding regimen. Tomato spikes. I will read up on those things. But I think they are not organic.

It would all be funny if I weren't involved.

He was wanting to test the pH. I said, we bought the soil. It should be fine.

Yes, next year, his and hers garden. He will retire in 18 months, then I have had it. I can see myself buying the MGG's tomatoes, going up there and decorating my tomato plants with his nice tomatoes. In the dark of night. You know, like decorating pagan trees. Only, I will be hanging tomatoes. I know. Not entirely honest. Well, not honest, period. But desperate times ...I know. I know.

Hey, this is exciting. We have a sister that grows orchids. Not on a major scale, but this she does. She gave me one. I callously murdered it. Then there was the one I got as a retirement gift. Murder again. Then I bought this pitiful thing. For 3.00$. I liked the little plastic dragon that clipped to it to hold the plant up. I am not kidding. Anyway, it is going to bloom. Seriously. it has those air roots all over the place, and this long appendage that I strongly suspect is going to be a blossom. I did get it the proper pot and food, and soil. If you want to call that stuff soil. and think, as I water it, and the water comes right out of the holes in the pot, "if you we're in a natural state, I guess you would be nestled up to a tree in the tropical forest, growing away. But you are here, in our house, on the treadle sewing machine, be nice to me," and lets hope that appendage is truly a blossom. And, yes, if it is, I will show photos, along with the grand kids!

I can show you photos of my German Ivy that, well, I could frame. If I could figure out how to print with the iPad.

Lance, thanks so much. Can you see me with the iPad, up there, reading away, trying to apply your good words.

I will read and learn. But I do sort of think a marriage counselor may have a niche in this scenario.

Thanks friends. As usual.

Edited July 4, 2013 by Miss Bea

[Miss Bea]

Miss Bea/ there is a couple in my cong. he is 80 and she is nearly there I love them both.

They are awesome Gardeners. he is dutch and she is Scottish. well its funny watching them.

He has one area thats his. He tends to it etc. She likes the old English cottage garden. There is room for both. She is not allowed to touch his. Nor he with her garden. She says in tonuge and cheek. He hates mine always so much work. But she has the easy maintained like Roses. etc. Lavender. Looks good anytime you go for a visit.

Maybe his and hers is a great way. Then you are both happy. Happy gardening    

I see this in my future. And I do not appreciate it. I hate competition. Maybe I will just grow what he does not grow. Ah, yes that will work. No basis for comparison. I will start planning my garden for next year. But if he grows good tomatoes, I will never live it down. Got to give this serious thought...

[surfergirl]

No competition Miss Bea. They have different styles of Garden. He likes the succulents and the shadey plants Like palms.

She has the cottage with roses and Lavender as well a vegie garden. They have made it look great. 

If you both like Gardening & you have the room. i have similar probs with My Hubby on the Gardening. He tells me how to do this and that way. etc. Well meaning of cause. But I have come to say to him. Just like he has different taste in Music and Beer.

I do too. Same with Gardening. So how about my hubby does one area how he likes and fines pleasure & I have my piece. I like growing Herbs and chilies and Roses and Lavender. they work for me.

I don't compare or compete in that area.( Only arm wrestling a joke intended) xo

[Julsey]

Won't it be wonderful when the soil will be rich once more, and Jehovah will bless the work of our actual hands?  No brown thumbs then, and I'm sure we will taste food the way it was meant to taste.  No more worries about whether or not the fruits or veggies we pick will be good.  They will all be delicious!