On the Perception of Race

[Thesauron]

I actually prefer the word unattractive to "ugly". I used it only to quote someone. These terms are subjective and many people can understand them differently depending on personal preferences, culture, country and race. As I pointed out in my earlier posts, I have not seen an "ugly" woman for a long time. If you really want to find out what the words mean, you can look them up in the Oxford dictionary. I think both of us will agree with their definitions. 
 
As for your seeing physically beautiful women "everywhere", I believe it means two things - either, you live in an area full of beautiful women or you are being too generous. 
 
You reminded me my dear friend from Australia who once lived in my home town. I would often hear him say that all women are beautiful, which always puzzled me, but I never asked him what he meant. I concluded that he only meant inner beauty. 

I know the dictionary meaning of the words, but we might interpret them differently. Unattractive people to me are people of any race displaying unattractive qualities combined, perhaps, with unattractive looks. Someone might have unattractive looks but still be fantastic since they display attractive qualities. It’s fascinating how they can even start to look attractive once you learn of their attractive personality.

People with attractive looks abound, but their looks say nothing about their inner person. Let me tell you about this sister I met years ago while travelling to an International Convention. She looked like a model. Not only that, she looked rich, and my first thought was “I’m not impressed...” until we started talking, and I learned that she was really outgoing and caring, and worked hard to put Jehovah first, having been a full time minister for some years.

Looks are really deceiving. It’s the inner person that counts, and you find that type of beauty in people with both attractive, plain, and unattractive looks.

[JennyM]

9 hours ago, carlos said:

It's doesn't make sense either to attribute good or bad qualities to people depending on their (subjective) beauty or lack thereof. Everybody has good and bad qualities. Rather than discarding a sister because she's stunningly beautiful or very ugly, it's much better to get to know that sister and find which spiritual qualities she has.

 

That being said, when you see a sister who attracts a lot of attention because she gives a lot of importance to her physical appearance, that usually means she's high maintenance. If you marry her you will always be paying for expensive clothes, contant haircuts, nails, gym, diets...

There was a straightforward talk... Do not marry a high maintenance.  An american bro who did the talk here in foreign language congregation. 

[JennyM]

10 hours ago, Thesauron said:

People with attractive looks abound, but their looks say nothing about their inner person. Let me tell you about this sister I met years ago while travelling to an International Convention. She looked like a model. Not only that, she looked rich, and my first thought was “I’m not impressed...” until we started talking, and I learned that she was really outgoing and caring, and worked hard to put Jehovah first, having been a full time minister for some years.

Looks are really deceiving. It’s the inner person that counts, and you find that type of beauty in people with both attractive, plain, and unattractive looks.

I stereotype rich good- looking person as high minded.. There are individuals like that here. I don't talk to them especially if its a brother.   😁

[JennyM]

16 hours ago, EccentricM said:

I've often found the certain looks I'm often attracted to are found in many Slavic or Eastern European women.

Donald trump's wife is Slavic.. 😊

what is unique in one culture is considered pretty in the other. 

 

There's a study that mixed race is better in looks and in academics.. But anyway, there's always a level of beauty in every race.. 

[EccentricM]

14 minutes ago, JennyM said:

Donald trump's wife is Slavic

Interesting, now she has some of the sharper facial features I find less appealing, but I can certainly see her genetics in the eyes. Of course you'll always find a spectrum of looks in all cultures. There is a certain "niche" though I often find is in many features of women I've liked. Perhaps @Bek might understand where I'm coming from? Softer features, more rounded or small, as opposed to the stonger jawlines and noses that many women have in my locality.

 

I find many men here and in the US, like women that have a broader or "sharper", or even more masculine facial structure (at least in "my" eyes). Examples by famous names I would give would be Natalie Portman, Cheryl Cole, Katie Price or Megan Fox. These women are considered the epitome of Western men's taste in women I'd say overall. But not for me personally.

 

 

Edited October 19, 2019 by EccentricM

[JennyM]

5 minutes ago, EccentricM said:

I find many men here and in the US, like women that have a broader or "sharper", or even more masculine facial structure (at least in "my" eyes). Examples by famous names I would give would be Natalie Portman, Cheryl Cole, Katie Price or Megan Fox. These women are considered the epitome of Western men's taste in women I'd say overall. But not for me personally.

 

East Asian men like Japanese and Koreans like rounded facial features or  more on feminine, cute.. they called it "Aegyo" in Korean.. 

I think what's in the heart appears in the face.. 😊.. 

 

There is a tendency that what our parents look like will strongly affect our choice of a partner.... My mom has a soft rounded features.. My dad is quite person.. not that talkative.. Im kinda more attracted to guys who has soft features too but of course he should display masculinity. 

 

 

[Thesauron]

I stereotype rich good- looking person as high minded.. There are individuals like that here. I don't talk to them especially if its a brother.   

Why won’t you talk to your brother?

[JennyM]

2 hours ago, Thesauron said:

Why won’t you talk to your brother?

I talked only when its important.. Different culture here. 

[Thesauron]

I talked only when its important.. Different culture here. 

They are our family though. One day we might need them for our survival, and that requires trust. Trust is something you build by creating personal relationships. Relationships begin by talking even about mundane things. Why do you blame culture for not building such a personal relationship to your brothers?

[JennyM]

15 minutes ago, Thesauron said:

They are our family though. One day we might need them for our survival, and that requires trust. Trust is something you build by creating personal relationships. Relationships begin by talking even about mundane things. Why do you blame culture for not building such a personal relationship to your brothers?

Its just so different here..... people will look at you even in the congregation..They always relate a man and a woman friendship for romantic..... Anyway, brothers are helpful here when its needed. 

[Thesauron]

Its just so different here..... people will look at you even in the congregation..They always relate a man and a woman friendship for romantic..... Anyway, brothers are helpful here when its needed. 

Does the law prohibit that you talk to a brother you are not related or married to?

[JennyM]

10 minutes ago, Thesauron said:

Does the law prohibit that you talk to a brother you are not related or married to?

I talked to brothers about theocratic activity and I talked to visiting Circuit Overseer too. 

One time, a German brother approached me and talked to me.. and it seems that  everyone is looking... lol! He is an instructor of pioneer service school.. I asked him about single parenting and pioneering.. 

[Thesauron]

I talked to brothers about theocratic activity and I talked to visiting Circuit Overseer too. 
One time, a German brother approached me and talked to me.. and it seems that  everyone is looking... lol! He is an instructor of pioneer service school.. I asked him about single parenting and pioneering.. 

Does it matter if everyone is looking? How did Jesus react to the Jewish culture of not talking to women? Did he talk to them?

[JennyM]

9 minutes ago, Thesauron said:

Does it matter if everyone is looking? How did Jesus react to the Jewish culture of not talking to women? Did he talk to them?

Jesus was in the ministry. He's not just making friends. 

In the ministry, if we see interested men then we do RV with brother... Not to do RV alone as a woman... 

[Thesauron]

Jesus was in the ministry. He's not just making friends. 
In the ministry, if we see interested men then we do RV with brother... Not to do RV alone as a woman... 

He made friends with Martha and Mariah, and also with Mary Magdalene. How was that possible?

[JennyM]

3 minutes ago, Thesauron said:

He made friends with Martha and Mariah, and also with Mary Magdalene. How was that possible?

hmm... maybe when my culture is going to be more open minded.. its just different here.. 

Jesus is different from other imperfect brothers here... Even my mom, she doesnt want me to spend much time with guys. lol!.. cultural thing... not common... can be misinterpreted easily.. 

[Thesauron]

hmm... maybe when my culture is going to be more open minded.. its just different here.. 

Jesus is different from other imperfect brothers here... Even my mom, she doesnt want me to spend much time with guys. lol!.. cultural thing... not common... can be misinterpreted easily.. 

Jesus was perfect and as such is different from anyone of us, but we are encouraged to imitate him. And one day it will prove to be just what people need to survive. How can you trust people you don’t know? And how can you know them without talking to them?

[JennyM]

58 minutes ago, Thesauron said:

Jesus was perfect and as such is different from anyone of us, but we are encouraged to imitate him. And one day it will prove to be just what people need to survive. How can you trust people you don’t know? And how can you know them without talking to them?

Yes it is.. The bible says "consider one another" .. How can you consider if you don't know them?

I have many brothers friends here...  if they are open minded and friendly.. I don't talk that much to those  who are very quiet and unfriendly.... 

 

For example, I was just giving commendation to a brother and he started to gossip me that I like him and that he likes me too.. thats so immature.. I only talk to him when we hire his car to go home after midweek meeting. 

[Thesauron]

Yes it is.. The bible says "consider one another" .. How can you consider if you don't know them?
I have many brothers friends here...  if they are open minded and friendly.. I don't talk that much to those  who are very quiet and unfriendly.... 
 
For example, I was just giving commendation to a brother and he started to gossip me that I like him and that he likes me too.. thats so immature.. I only talk to him when we hire his car to go home after midweek meeting. 

Maybe he really thought you had some other feelings for him than what is called for to make you a spiritual family? Of course it’s no fun when someone starts to spread untruths and gossip about us.

Even a quiet person can be very friendly. I know a mature single sister who will not talk much or make a lot of noice, but she will always go out of her way to care for your needs. We go back a long time, and I don’t have romantic feelings for her, but we are great friends. With her you can be your simple self and there’s no need to put on a show.

People who are quiet and withdrawn are harder to get close to, but it can be very rewarding.

[JennyM]

9 minutes ago, Thesauron said:

Maybe he really thought you had some other feelings for him than what is called for to make you a spiritual family? Of course it’s no fun when someone starts to spread untruths and gossip about us.

Giving commendation? Is that romantic interest? ... 

When I was going back to the truth, my pillar of support were Swedish and Irish brothers(boyfriends of my filipina friends, older than me) , They helped me to be strong .. Jehovah knows thats what I need cause I never had received attention from my father.. so it was kinda I need a male's love .. 

 

My first bible conductor was a Filipino elder.. He was 45 , I was 16...  I don't know if you call that friendship.

[Thesauron]

Giving commendation? Is that romantic interest? ... 
When I was going back to the truth, my pillar of support were Swedish and Irish brothers(boyfriends of my filipina friends, older than me) , They helped me to be strong .. Jehovah knows thats what I need cause I never had received attention from my father.. so it was kinda I need a male's love .. 
 
My first bible conductor was a Filipino elder.. He was 45 , I was 16...  I don't know if you call that friendship.

Some brothers and sisters will grasp for any straws. That is not our fault. But it might be necessary to tell those individuals that there is no romantic interest at all?

Perhaps friendship was what you had with your Bible study conductor?

I know a number of 16 year old sisters who will gladly greet me with a hug and chat with me till my ears fall off. I wouldn’t want it any other way.

I particularly remember a young sister I worked with in the ministry when I was visiting a congregation. She had to show me around the territory, and that was new to her, haha, but I like to think she grew with that experience. We talked about where her friends from school lived and how she reacts when she visits them in the ministry. Her family was working some streets nearby.

[JennyM]

1 minute ago, Thesauron said:

Perhaps friendship was what you had with your Bible study conductor?

i considered him as my father.. I don't know if thats possible today... People are too malicious these days.. 

He has been caring like a father to me...... 

[Bek]

13 hours ago, EccentricM said:

Interesting, now she has some of the sharper facial features I find less appealing, but I can certainly see her genetics in the eyes. Of course you'll always find a spectrum of looks in all cultures. There is a certain "niche" though I often find is in many features of women I've liked. Perhaps @Bek might understand where I'm coming from? Softer features, more rounded or small, as opposed to the stonger jawlines and noses that many women have in my locality.

 

I find many men here and in the US, like women that have a broader or "sharper", or even more masculine facial structure (at least in "my" eyes). Examples by famous names I would give would be Natalie Portman, Cheryl Cole, Katie Price or Megan Fox. These women are considered the epitome of Western men's taste in women I'd say overall. But not for me personally.

 

I think the reason why Trump's wife has sharp features is that many Southern Slavs intermarried ancient indigenous peoples in the Balkans such as Thracians, Dacians, Goths, Celtics and Illyrians. 

 

Yes, I understand you Matthew.I have looked up the women you mentioned, and I agree they look a bit masculine. Eastern Slavic women do have softer features, and they generally look great even without much make-up.  

 

The first one is Ukrainian and the second one is Russian.  

 

  

 

Edited October 19, 2019 by Alan
modesty

[JennyM]

23 minutes ago, Bek said:

I think the reason why Trump's wife has sharp features is that many Southern Slavs intermarried ancient indigenous peoples in the Balkans such as Thracians, Dacians, Goths, Celtics and Illyrians. 

maybe plastic surgery. 

[JennyM]

@Bek Why do  many Latina women win the Miss universe than Eastern women? You can find those kind of softer facial features in all race.... I once saw a beautiful black woman.. her skin is like chocolate, but shes so beautiful .. I can't take my eyes on her.