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Hello....... Been awhile since I have been here.

So much has been going on. ARGH!!!!!!! My sister in law in Columbus asked us to move down to help her out with her home, son, and health. Her knees are bad, and she may have to have corrective surgery. The house is a disaster. Thank goodness I know how to fix everything that's wrong. So, my wife and I have agreed to move down to help. I think it'd be better since where I live, I can't find a decent job to save my life. I can barely get over 20 hrs a week at work. We have suffering in every aspect because of it. We sold our house, and the day of our move, I have asked a few brothers to help. They all told me no. Worldly people offered to help. In the back of my mind, that sucks!!! So, I ended up loading the uhaul by myself. It took over 9 hrs!!! The fridge was heavy! lol.... Then 5.5 hr drive down. Normally takes 3 hrs, but I was pulling our car behind so I had to take my time.

We have been down here for over a week now. Getting things settled down. Finally relaxing a bit today.

Just wanted you all to know, I didn't forget about you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All at the same time, a brother, my friend, got married a week before. He was going to get married in April, but couldn't wait. I was both happy and upset. I have been trying to get a hold of him to tell him congratulations! Nothing back from him. I ask his mom, and she won't tell me anything. I don't know what to do. I was NEVER upset about the whole thing. What gets me is I was so supportive of his whole engagement, while a Ministerial servant kept dogging him, telling him he's not ready, he's to young, he's not responsible enough, etc etc etc. Yet the brother invited him and his wife over for the engagement party, but not me and my wife. I can't get a hold of him to see if I have offended him or whatnot.

Anyways................

LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Micah, such an awful thing for you. I can feel your pain.

I have a situation with my sister that I finally had to just let go of and let her go her way, thinking all the while that she is in the right. I've tried to talk with her, to no avail, so now until she decides to forgive me for something I didn't do, it will just have to sit there. I refused to let it fester in my thinking, or to treat her other than I have always treated her. She goes to the meetings, and sometimes refuses to look at me or speak. Then other times I think she must be over it. Nope, next meeting we're back to avoidindance.

It will do you no good, mentally or physically, to continue to worry over it. I know it hurts when we are misunderstood, quoted improperly, or completely lied about. But as this is your friend, try to put it away. Sometimes we just have to let things play out and in the end maybe it will turn out in your favor.

Saten is just trying to get us to pay more attention to a problem than to serve Jehovah, with joy. Welcome back, by the way.

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I have the same thing with my sister. She is not an easy person to get along with, no one in the family really talks with her, I still did because out of my siblings, she and I are the only ones left who stayed in the truth. She is very narcisstic and a bit paranoid, she is convince everyone is talking about her behind her back, plotting against her, etc. She also imagines all kinds of things. You can say something to her completely innocent, and she will spend so much time in twisting what you said to make it seem like you said something bad about her. And if she hears bits and pieces of a story, she will try to put the entire story together, and she never gets it right, so then she gets mad at you for nothing, but rather an imagined story she put together in her head.

A year ago, things got difficult, again, and I finally made a decision that I couldn't do this anymore with her. The fighting, trying to reason with her, trying to explain to her that the thoughts in her head are not correct and she is misunderstanding things, just became too much for me. Her screaming and vile words were enough. For my mental and emotional health, I had to stop talking to her. Unfortunately, she doesn't understand why I stopped talking to her as in her opinion, she has never done anything wrong, so I am this awful, terrible person who should not be a witness cause I won't speak to my fleshly and spiritual sister, and according to her, "Jehovah will take care of you in the end".

I realized that I can't fix her this side of armageddon. Nothing I say will fix her. Only Jehovah can do that. I know she loves Jehovah, she is just a bit messed up. As one brother told me, "there are some things in this world that will never be fixed until after Armageddon. Sometimes it's best to accept that, move on, have some peace in your life, and know that Jehovah will fix matters in his own time" When he told me that, I was like "wow", that is so true. And since I have stopped talking to her, I really feel good. My life is peaceful.

My dad pointed me to Eph 4:26 "Be wrathful,* and yet do not sin;+ let the sun not set with YOU in a provoked state" He said to me "It's ok to be angry, we are going to get angry with people. But don't sin. Don't hate them, love them, pray for them, pray for Jehovah to give you the strength to deal with your anger and be forgiving. Don't think bad thoughts about them, don't wish bad things to happen to them." This helped me alot as well.

I don't hate her, I pray for her, and I hope that after Armageddon, if we both make it, that I will see the person Jehovah sees in her. Til then, I have to keep focusing on my spirituality, my relationship with Jehovah, my children's relationship, and just pray that all the ones I love, and all the brothers and sisters in the world who are all struggling make it til the end.

That's all I can do.

Hang in there Micah, we are all dealing with something, you are not alone.

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Sounds like it was a "good thing" you were not invited to the wedding. This way it saved you from either having to say no or having attended not knowing and feeling really out of place.

Now, just like the road you took from your house to your sisters, it is all behind you. Look ahead and my Jehovah be with you.

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For Ava

Sounds like my mother-in-law. The being paranoid bit, etc.

She told us late last spring she wanted to move in with us before winter. She was scared of falling again.

Well she was here 2 weeks in Aug. then decided to move early Sept-while keeping her apt.

We re-did the large bedroom for a bedroom/sitting room for her. The small bedroom we squeezed into necessitated our getting rid of a lot.

Then we got satelite TV ( she has to have her TV ) and a magic jack VOIP phone with her apt phone number ported over, etc., etc.

Between moving ( she gave a brother $45 in gas, he is 1/2 further away than the 1 1/4 hours we are,

we paid our own gas and border charges ), TV setup-monthly charges, fixing up room and trips

back to her doctors, 3 trips in one month- it cost about $1500 split in 2. ( we are on a fixed income and are still paying off last car repairs )

2 months later she moves back home saying she never goes out in service ( she waits for sisters to call her to make arraingements )

However here when she was out-she talked about things she ought not-many imagined- slights, we are after her money

( this out in service and making a scene at stores and banks, etc.)

One young pioneer sister was out with us in service one Sun after meeting and m-i-l started up- well this young sister told me-"I don't know

how you put up with it' -no wonder many didn't want to work with her.

I know the friends in her congregation ( she moved back ) has gotten a distorted view of our congregation and us.

In all, it is a lot less stressfull on our marriage, and my wife isn't always ready to explode over her mother, the past 3 weeks,

however m-i-l wants us to have same brother, our friend from another city, take all her stuff back ( we left her apt so she could have basically 2 homes ) -she won't ask her friends who live in her cong territory to do it and we have a car needing more repairs ( auto part to be in this coming week ). Our friend just started reg pioneering and is banking hours ( 90 per month ) for real bad winter weather or when too hot for him, does not really have the time.

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  • 1 month later...

I just read this post, Micah. First of all--I have always enjoyed your comments, and your cheerful face--I hope you continue to find encouragement and joy on this forum!

Please don't think that all brothers and sisters will be like you described in your comments when you need help. Sometimes they are thoughtless and forget things. Sometimes they just don't have the resources or means necessary to help. I've done both of those, wishing that things were different, that I were a better person, or able to save better so that I could help someone when needed. That is why we are urged to "continue putting up with one another", and also to continue working on improving ourselves. It's when we give up trying that we lose Jehovah's approval.

Whatever trials an tests of your faith that you and your family are facing now, I pray that with Jehovah's help, you can come through victorious and stronger than before.

Agape:encourage:

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