Summer Classes for Jehovah's Witnesses (Just for fun)

[Musky]

Someone posted this on Meekspace, so I thought I'd share.

 

Summer Classes for Jehovah's Witnesses 

Registration must be completed by 

May 31, 2014 

 

NOTE: Due to the complexity and difficulty level of their contents, class sizes must be limited to 8 participants maximum 

 

 

Class 1 

What To Donate to the Driver Of The Service Group ---- How much gas can $1 really buy? 

--- Step by Step with Slide Presentation 

Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. 

 

Class 2 

The Kingdom Hall Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself? 

Round Table Discussion 

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. 

 

Class 3 

Is It Possible To Use The Bathroom in Only 5 Minutes by Using The Technique Of Not Talking? 

--- Group Practice 

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. 

 

Class 4 

Fundamental Differences Between Brief Comments and Long Winded "Look-At-Me-I'm-Teaching-The-Congregation" Commentaries 

Examples on Video 

Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. 

 

Class 5

Taking out your screaming child before the speaker has to ask you---Seriously, they are not being "cute"!

Examples on Video and Role-playing

Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays 7:00 PM

 

Class 6 

Learning How To Solve Problems --- Starting With Looking In Your Own Bible and Publications!

(You DO have the same publications as the elders) 

Open Forum 

Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. 

 

Class 7 

Life After Local Needs Parts --- Are the Elders really talking to you? 

Pictures and Explanatory Graphics 

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM 

 

Class 8 

Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between a Headache & Realizing It's Actually Your Conscience disturbing You 

Online Classes and role-playing 

Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined 

 

....................................................... ....................................................... .....

 

Upon completion of any of the above courses, 

diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

 

EDIT: Since "Class 5" was omitted in the original copy I received, i made up my own!

Edited September 9, 2014 by Musky
Added Class 5

[GrumpysWife]

We must be in the 1st class and nobody has learned a thing yet.

[jayrtom]

Someone posted this on Meekspace, so I thought I'd share.

Summer Classes for Jehovah's Witnesses

Registration must be completed by

May 31, 2014

NOTE: Due to the complexity and difficulty level of their contents, class sizes must be limited to 8 participants maximum

Class 1

What To Donate to the Driver Of The Service Group ---- How much gas can $1 really buy?

--- Step by Step with Slide Presentation

Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2

The Kingdom Hall Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?

Round Table Discussion

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3

Is It Possible To Use The Bathroom in Only 5 Minutes by Using The Technique Of Not Talking?

--- Group Practice

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4

Fundamental Differences Between Brief Comments and Long Winded "Look-At-Me-I'm-Teaching-The-Congregation" Commentaries

Examples on Video

Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 6

Learning How To Solve Problems --- Starting With Looking In Your Own Bible and Publications!

(You DO have the same publications as the elders)

Open Forum

Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 7

Life After Local Needs Parts --- Are the Elders really talking to you?

Pictures and Explanatory Graphics

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 8

Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between a Headache & Realizing It's Actually Your Conscience disturbing You

Online Classes and role-playing

Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

....................................................... ....................................................... .....

Upon completion of any of the above courses,

diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

Can't they prolong the dead line for registration? May/2014 is long gone :,(

Enviado do meu G630-U10 através de Tapatalk

Edited September 9, 2014 by jayrtom

[timpin]

We must be in the 1st class and nobody has learned a thing yet.

Class 1   ...   don'tcha like it when they stick it under the headrest for all to see.   .... good reason to break into car. 

[GrumpysWife]

Class 1   ...   don'tcha like it when they stick it under the headrest for all to see.   .... good reason to break into car. 

I thought that was to make sure that everyone knows they donated their $1.00.

[cricket246]

Nope if they are too nice and won't accept, put it in the pocket on the back of their seat, in a side pocket in the door where it can't be seen, (if it's your best friend) stick in in their purse lol. I've learned to be a sneaky donater as many here won't accept gas money.   :wub:  

Edited September 9, 2014 by cricket246

[Musky]

Since there was no "class 5" I added my own

[steadfast]

Another class should be added for proofreading when posting on the internet. Yeah, I said it! 

 

Since there was no "class 5" I added my own

[Musky]

Another class should be added for proofreading when posting on the internet. Yeah, I said it! 

 

OK, Where did I mess up?

[GrumpysWife]

Since there was no "class 5" I added my own

Excellent.

[trottigy]

Another class should be added for proofreading when posting on the internet. Yeah, I said it! 

 

 

Gary (or is is Simon - just kidding!!!) I seriously NEED that class!!! Where can I sign up and will I really be better when it is done??????    

 

Can we add one for all who may have Q&A parts - for remembering people's names    I need that one TOO!!!!!

[steadfast]

OK, Where did I mess up?

 

You posted, that's where you messed up! 

 

Actually, I was referring to the fact that someone left off class 5... And the many, many posts where I can't decipher what the poster meant.

[Musky]

You posted, that's where you messed up! 

 

Actually, I was referring to the fact that someone left off class 5... And the many, many posts where I can't decipher what the poster meant.

 

I blame "auto-correct" for a lot of that, but people should still proof read before hitting "post" (Shawn) 

[steadfast]

OK, Where did I mess up?

 

I forgot, you messed up on the capital W in Where after a comma. What do you blame that on?   

 

I think I'm about to get banned. 

Edited September 9, 2014 by steadfast

[Luezette]

Oh man! You guys got me cracking up here!

So, ok, maybe not with the proofreading class. I need that one. (did you notice how clear this post is...this time? Lol.