Satan vs Jehovah

[Samberr74]

This is a little humuorous ( i think)

 

Shortly after Jehovah created Adam and Eve , an angel (later known as Satan) approached Jehovah and stated that his creation was nothing special and he could do the same.

 

Jehovah says to Satan "If you feel you can do what I have done here, create a man and give him life, then by all means go ahead."

 

With that Satan thrust out his hand and grabbed a handful of dirt. Jehovah grabs his hand and says "NO NO! use your own dirt!"

 

 

[byronebula]

HAHAHAHAHA!... Love it! Classic.... =D

[Rosalie4u]

LOL

[GrumpysWife]

[Wren]

Ha ha ha ha! That's really good and I've heard it used as Evolutionists vs God, as well.

[Samberr74]

A man was talking to Jehovah and started asking questions..

"Jehovah the man said is it true that an 1000 years for me is a blink of the eye to you ?, Jehovah replied yes.

Is it true that 1 million dollars is to you just a penny?, Jehovah replied yes that is true.

Then can I borrow a penny? the man asked, Jehovah answers sure give me a minute.

[Debbie]

Funny!!!

[Dages]

hehehe

I love the first one, this is the first time i read it.

[byronebula]

while reading this though. . . Two things came to mind. . .

Firstly, i was just wondering. . . . Would the use of God's name in a Joke for example, constitute as taking up God's name "in vain"?. . . Or "in a worthless way". . . I'm not trying to be hard on anyone, i was just wondering lol. . . I mean, does it detract from its sanctity? . . .

The other thing i was wondering. . . Wouldn't it be nice if we had a thread just for clean jokes where we everyone can post on?. . . Do we have that already?. . . So if sometimes we just feel like we need a chuckle or two on something clean, we'd know just where to go to. . . (unless there already is something like that) . . .

Just two random yet related thoughts.

[Dages]

We already have jokes topics

[Samberr74]

Would the use of God's name in a Joke for example, constitute as taking up God's name "in vain"?. . . Or "in a worthless way". . ..

Ouch!

I could possibly see your point but.....where is the disrespect in the use of Jehovah's name? we are encouraged to use the name of Jehovah.... are we not?

[Shawnster]

Would the use of God's name in a Joke for example, constitute as taking up God's name "in vain"?. . . Or "in a worthless way". . ..

Ouch!

I could possibly see your point but.....where is the disrespect in the use of Jehovah's name? we are encouraged to use the name of Jehovah.... are we not?

Would changing the joke from "Jehovah" to "God" make it acceptable? Is it the name Jehovah that is more important than the title, God? Or, is there some deeper meaning to the commandment about not using God's name in vain or a worthless way?

*** it-2 p. 1086 Ten Words ***

The third commandment, in its proper and logical sequence, declared: “You must not take up the name of Jehovah your God in a worthless way.” (Ex 20:7) This harmonizes with the prominence attached to Jehovah’s name throughout the Hebrew Scriptures (6,973 times in NW; see JEHOVAH [importance of the Name]). Within just these few verses of the Ten Words (Ex 20:2-17), the name occurs eight times. The phrase “not take up” has the thought of “not pronounce” or “not lift up (carry).” To do this to God’s name in “a worthless way” would be to lift up that name to a falsehood, or “in vain.” The Israelites who were privileged to bear Jehovah’s name as his witnesses and who became apostate were in effect taking up and carrying about Jehovah’s name in a worthless way.—Isa 43:10; Eze 36:20, 21.

Interesting to note that the apostate Israelites are here described as carrying about Jehovah's name in a worthless way. Apostacy is more than use or misuse of Jehovah's name.

Do the jokes put Jehovah in a bad light? Do they lower him to our level? Do they turn him into a mockery or something to laugh at? Is he the subject of the joke?

Just some questions to think about.

[trottigy]

Do the jokes put Jehovah in a bad light? Do they lower him to our level? Do they turn him into a mockery or something to laugh at? Is he the subject of the joke?

As the 2 jokes you posted don't do this - they are fine. In fact, they show how he is superior - even in reasoning ability. Good job. >

[Samberr74]

Thanks Trottigy i was becoming concerned i had offened everyone, , I would never intentionally do anything to make a mockery of Jehovah.

[trottigy]

Don't ever worry about that. Worse case - someone will click "report" on your post or a mod will see it. If it is offensive we will remove it and PM you about (similar to Mtt 18 - talk to you first and not everyone else) and go from there.

Keep the fun stuff coming - we need it in the crazy word we live in. Remember Jehovah is the happy God (1 Tim 1:11) and Jesus enjoys fun also - as our happy Potentate (1 Tim 6:15)

[Debbie]

Do the jokes put Jehovah in a bad light? Do they lower him to our level? Do they turn him into a mockery or something to laugh at? Is he the subject of the joke?

As the 2 jokes you posted don't do this - they are fine. In fact, they show how he is superior - even in reasoning ability. Good job. ><

I agree with Jerry. Shawn, I wasn't offended either. Jehovah was not put in a bad light. Take care of yourself.

[GrumpysWife]

Do the jokes put Jehovah in a bad light? Do they lower him to our level? Do they turn him into a mockery or something to laugh at? Is he the subject of the joke?

As the 2 jokes you posted don't do this - they are fine. In fact, they show how he is superior - even in reasoning ability. Good job. ><

I agree with Jerry. Shawn, I wasn't offended either. Jehovah was not put in a bad light. Take care of yourself.

Me too!

[byronebula]

Ouch!

I could possibly see your point but.....where is the disrespect in the use of Jehovah's name? we are encouraged to use the name of Jehovah.... are we not?

Hey brother Sam! ... I wasn't throwing any punches . . . Lol.... It was nothing personal at all. . . . I just like to get things off my mind clarified, rather than it just sit there cluelessly. . . . Sorry if that hurt though.

I was just thinking of Matthew 6:9, "Let your name be sanctified" . . . (by the way, there's an older publication by that name, loving it!). . . Sanctifying God's name means, making it holy. That means we wouldn't just "carelessly" use that name in just any context. We would be conscious of how we use it, simply because its holy, and should be sanctified. So, with that point in mind, i was just curious, i was just wondering (i wonder a little too often i guess), if a joke was something that would detract from the holiness of God's name, because God's name is not a joke. LOL. But giving it more thought was a good idea:

We were created in God's image, and since we have the capacity to enjoy humor, and have a sense of it, wouldn't that mean that Jehovah God also has a sense of humor?. . . So i'm quite sure that using God's name with with reference to humor itself, does not detract from anything at all.

And Thanks brother Shawn for your input! . . . Yes, as brother Shawn pointed out, using God's name in a worthless way involves the use of God's name with falsehood and slander etc. Since the jokes above were clean, truthful and harmonious with bible principles, they do not in any way infringe on the command, nor do they detract from the sanctity.

There's nothing "unholy" about a good sense of humor and clean fun. It really reflects the qualities of our happy Creator.

Thanks again for sharing those jokes, keep them coming!

[trottigy]

I love being a witness and having such a wonderful brotherhood. You guys / gals are truly wonderful

[Debbie]

I love being a witness and having such a wonderful brotherhood. You guys / gals are truly wonderful

Right back at you Jerry and everyone else on JWTalk!

[destiny]

I was just thinking of Matthew 6:9, "Let your name be sanctified" . . . (by the way, there's an older publication by that name, loving it!). . . Sanctifying God's name means, making it holy. That means we wouldn't just "carelessly" use that name in just any context. We would be conscious of how we use it, simply because its holy, and should be sanctified. And Thanks brother Shawn for your input! . . . Yes, as brother Shawn pointed out, using God's name in a worthless way involves the use of God's name with falsehood and slander etc.

I suppose it can be viewed as a conscience matter, for the very reasons that you mention here, I personally would not use Jehovah's name in conjunction with a "million dollar joke"..but that's just me, (my conscience) Byron I certainly appreciate yours and shawns imput. We just love each other don't we...;

but i'm always up for a good joke.

shawnster keep posting your comments are always well balaned and scripturally based i love them;)

[trottigy]

shawnster keep posting your comments are always well balaned and scripturally based i love them;)

Ditto

[PGgenius]

shawnster keep posting your comments are always well balaned and scripturally based i love them;)

Ditto

it seems to me that this was a good-tasting comedy

but the finally sobering counterbalance report

Satan's Meeting (read - especially ---- if you're busy)

Satan called a worldwide convention of demons.

In his opening address he said:" We can't keep

Christians from going to the Kingdom Hall."

"We can't keep them from forming an intimate

relationship with Jehovah God.

"Once they gain that connection with Jehovah,

our power over them is broken.

"So let them go to their Kingdom Halls; let

them have their covered dish dinners but steal their

time, so they don't have time to develop a

relationship with Jehovah.

"This is what I want you to do", said the

devil: "Distract them from gaining hold of their GOD

and maintaining that vital connection throughout the

day!"

"How shall we do this?" his demons shouted.

"Keep them busy in the non essentials of life

and invent innumerable schemes to occupy their minds,"

he answered.

"Temp them to spend, spend, spend and borrow,

borrow, borrow. Persuade them to work 6-7 days each

week, 10-12 hours a day.

"Keep them from spending time with their

children", "As their families fragment, soon, their

homes will offer no escape from the pressures of

work!"

"Over-stimulate their minds so that they

cannot hear that still, small voice saying "This is

the Way" "Entice them to play the radio or cassette

player whenever they drive..

"To keep the TV, VCR, CD'S, and their PCs going

constantly in their home and see to it that every

store and restaurant in the world plays debasing music

constantly."

"This will jam their minds and break that

union with their God Jehovah."

"Fill the coffee tables with magazines and

newspapers."

"Pound their minds with the news 24 hours a

day." "Invade their driving moments with billboards."

"Flood their mailboxes with junk mail, mail

order Catalogs, sweepstakes, and every kind of

newsletter and promotional offering free products,

services and false hopes. "

"Keep skinny, beautiful models on the

magazines and TV so their husbands will believe that

outward beauty is what's important, and they'll become

dissatisfied with their wives."

"Keep the wives too tired to love their

husbands at night. Give them headaches too!"

"If they don't give their husbands the love

they need, they will begin to look elsewhere."

"That will fragment their families quickly!"

"Keep them too busy to go out in nature and

reflect on God's creation. Send them to amusement

parks, sporting events, plays, concerts, and movies

instead." "Keep them busy, busy, busy!" And when they

meet for spiritual fellowship, involve them in gossip

and small talk so that they leave with troubled

consciences. "

"Crowd their lives with so many good causes

they have no time to seek power from Jehovah."

"Soon they will be all working in their own

strength, sacrificing their health and family for the

good of the cause.."

"It will work!" "It will work!"

It was quite a plan! The demons went eagerly

to their assignments causing Christians everywhere to

get more busy and more rushed, going here and there.

Having little time for their God or their families.

Having no time to tell others about the good news of

the Kingdom. I guess the question is has the devil

been successful at his scheme? You be the judge! What

does "busy" mean:

B-eing

U-nder

S-atan's

Y-oke?

Please pass this on, if you aren't too BUSY!

"A true companion is loving all the time, and is a

brother that is born for when there is distress."

--Proverbs 17:17

If you not understand my words, the fault is not yours.- "but I am not a fluent speaker, neither since yesterday nor since before that nor since your speaking to your servant, for I am slow of mouth and slow of tongue."

[Debbie]

Satan's Meeting (read - especially ---- if you're busy)

Jani, I loved it!!! May we never be "BUSY"! Thanks for posting it. ><