MARRIAGE AND AGE DIFFERENCE..

[Nelly Kim]

22 hours ago, Brother Jack said:

I personally don’t want to get married in this system of things for several reasons. One of them being the fact that life in this system is very short. Marriage is permanent. I’d rather take my time looking for a mate in the new world. There’s no need to rush looking for a mate. 

My thoughts Exactly!! I have a fragile heart... I can't bear to loose my the Love of my life. Love in Satan's world is so impermanent.. I'll wait .. 

[Cushi]

3 hours ago, Nelly Michael said:

My thoughts Exactly!! I have a fragile heart... I can't bear to loose my the Love of my life. Love in Satan's world is so impermanent.. I'll wait .. 

Are you saying that you don’t want to run the risk of getting married and your mate not make it into the new world?

[Nelly Kim]

43 minutes ago, Brother Jack said:

Are you saying that you don’t want to run the risk of getting married and your mate not make it into the new world?

( Smiling) Yes, that too. Though I initially meant parting in death. But yes, my mate not making it into the New-world is a scary thought as well... In fact, Now that I think of it, it's more scary than losing him in death... Its frightening..  

[Cushi]

1 minute ago, Nelly Michael said:

( Smiling) Yes, that too. Though I initially meant parting in death. But yes, my mate not making it into the New-world is a scary thought as well... In fact, Now that I think of it, it's more scary than losing him in death... Its frightening..  

oh, ok. When I said life is short I didn’t mean that life in this system is short in the literal sense, as one would die. I meant that the time we have to look for a mate is far shorter in this system than the time we would have to look for one in the new world. So there’s no need to rush 🙂

[Sister Twister]

4 minutes ago, Nelly Michael said:

( Smiling) Yes, that too. Though I initially meant parting in death. But yes, my mate not making it into the New-world is a scary thought as well... In fact, Now that I think of it, it's more scary than losing him in death... Its frightening..  

You have a really mature view , and your waiting on Jehovah will be rewarded .

[Nelly Kim]

2 minutes ago, Brother Jack said:

oh, ok. When I said life is short I didn’t mean that life in this system is short in the literal sense, as one would die. I meant that the time we have to look for a mate is far shorter in this system than the time we would have to look for one in the new world. So there’s no need to rush 🙂

O I get you now... That's right... @ Brother Jack, you are determined to find that perfect wife aren't you. ( laughing). Well there'll be time indeed in the new world

[Jack1979]

On 12/23/2020 at 4:38 PM, Maria Keerie said:

iv got to used to having a big bed to myself ! and watching what I want on the TV !

Amen! to the bed by myself and being able to watch what I want! Lol

 

My wife and I have been separated for a bit over 3 years now. I am now 41. Baptized for just over a year. She was disfellowshipped when we met but returned to the congregation several years ago, after we married. 
 

Unfortunately, she wants a divorce and is within her rights to proceed that way. 
 

Honestly, I can’t picture myself remarried at this point, at any time in the future. I think feelings of guilt and failure I have will be too much to even think about burdening someone else. Damaged goods would be a good way to describe the feelings. 
 

We are the same age. But, Jehovah was never really a part of our marriage. Not before... and certainly not during. 
 

It makes me sad quite often that things turned out the way that they did. And it serves as a very sharp thorn to ever remind me of the most important thing to consider when marrying or even thinking about marriage... Jehovah.

 

Jehovah needs to be the center of that relationship for it to work. And Jehovah cannot be the center of that relationship if he does not occupy my heart first.
 

So though my situation did not turn out the way I wish it would’ve, I am reminded that MY relationship with Jehovah, is the most important relationship I should ever have moving forward. It is the one that I need to devote my every waking moment into maintaining... nurturing... cultivating. 
 

Long story short... I guess what I am trying to say is that though age, culture, economic and other factors (as Brother Carlos pointed out) are important to consider, ones own personal relationship with Jehovah, and the prospective mates relationship with Jehovah... are bar none the most important factors to consider in regards to marriage. 
 

Sorry if I was too much of a Debbie Downer (and sorry if that offends any sisters named Debbie🤷‍♂️). 
 

Thank you for bringing such a thought provoking question to the table @Nelly Michael!
 

 

 

[Sister Twister]

18 hours ago, Jack1979 said:

 

ones own personal relationship with Jehovah, and the prospective mates relationship with Jehovah... are bar none the most important factors to consider in regards to marriage

 

Its not a Debbie (or David) Downer at all its so interesting to hear your experience , there is a brother here in a really similar situation , he describes it as he and his wife ( who was a inactive sister when they met and he was her worldly boss) were like two trains going in the opposite directions , for a while they ran along side each other as they passed and that was the time she reactivated and he studied and became a brother and things were good for just a short time .

 

She was disfellowshipped and he put his whole heart soul and mind into the truth, he is an elder and a pioneer now and while his life isn't always easy and from time to time he gets down , he knows that sticking with Jehovah was absolutely to right thing to do, he is very loved in his congregation and has had an opportunity to remarry a while back , but decided to focus on Jehovah until the new system but he did say IF he did decide to remarry he would need to be certain his wife had a record of putting Jehovah above everything and everyone .

[Vinnie]

Let's open up our imagination for a moment.

 

Imagine if age was the only component  or criteria used to determine a marriage mate.  When you compare a person who has gained 20 years of life experience with someone who has gained 200 years of life experience, no doubt the person with 200 years of life experience would have so much more to offer. 

 

What is your favourite fruit? For arguments sake, lets just say its a Red Delicious apple. We can tell that an apple is at it's peak maturity on a tree when it is no longer green but fully coloured red.  The problem today is apples are now picked when they are still immature and green and chemically ripened. So it may look beautiful red and shiny on the outside but still green on the inside and after one small bite, you just want to toss it away and say EWW Yuck!!

 

Do you like the people living in your generation? Of course Due to the limitations of life in this system we are limited to the people in our immediate generation.  Imagine life after all generations are resurrected. What would a 30 year old be like who lived 100 years ago or 1000 years ago be like?   

 

When it comes to age, the question to ask is what sort of person are you? Are you the type who wants someone with more life experience than you, less life experience or the same?  Just thoughts to ponder....

 

Now think about  all the components and criteria that you really should make when choosing a mate.  We all have our own list. Where on the list does age difference belong for you? Is it closer to the top of your list or closer to the bottom? Where is it when your 20 years old as compared to when your 50 years old?   

 

As far as I have observed, people change at age 20, 23, 25, 27 ,30, 50, 70 etc.. No one ever remains the same. 

 

Reality is always different than what we think. When we truly, honestly, really find that someone special, you may be surprised to find  that age criteria to be more flexible than you thought.  That being said,  when it comes to age, stick to what is important to you as much as possible because it's better to have someone meet your list as closely as possible than to have someone no where near your list.

[Dages]

Also, when I will be 75826486841641834129 years old... my wife being 11 years older than me?... who will care ?