Do you sometimes feel like the world has more good-looking people?

[ChrisW]

3 hours ago, IceBreeze said:

plastic fantastic

LOL

[ChrisW]

2 hours ago, Sete said:

"That's life"

[Lori]

On 7/18/2023 at 3:58 PM, IceBreeze said:

Why would someone consider to leave Jehovah anyways?

A friend in the truth told me once something very to the point; There is NO reason to leave Jehovah!

 

Ones who actually leave Jehovah miss the intention to stick to Jehovah's moral principles.

Sometimes people who were JW's are hurt terribly bad by someone from their congregation and they just can't see themselves going back to the hall.   

Another reason could be because a bunch of bad things have been happening to the brother and sister, one thing after another, and their relationship with Jehovah gets put on the back burner because of that.    Too many stresses that have happened.   Death of a parent, legal issues, homelessness....  the list could go on and on.   

 

I know of a sister who recently left the truth.  We texted alot.   She was sick and tired of being treated badly by people in the congregation and being judged by them.     She couldn't take it anymore so she left.   Well, she and her husband left. I was broken hearted.   This just happened in the last month.   We need each other in the congregation.  We need to support and up build each other.   When we don't get that,  we feel alone and lonely.  We feel betrayed.  Depressed.  And we just decide that we can't handle the way that we're treated anymore so stop attending meetings.   We shut people out of our lives.  

 

Everyone has different ways to cope with life.   We're not all the same.    And we're all imperfect.  

 

 

[Dhanyel]

7 hours ago, Lori said:

Às vezes, as pessoas que eram Testemunhas de Jeová são terrivelmente feridas por alguém de sua congregação e simplesmente não conseguem se ver voltando para o salão.   

Outra razão pode ser porque um monte de coisas ruins estão acontecendo com o irmão e a irmã, uma coisa após a outra, e o relacionamento deles com Jeová é colocado em segundo plano por causa disso. Muitos estresses que aconteceram. Morte de um dos pais, questões legais, falta de moradia.... a lista poderia continuar indefinidamente.   

 

Conheço uma irmã que recentemente abandonou a verdade. Mandamos muitas mensagens. Ela estava cansada de ser maltratada pelas pessoas da congregação e de ser julgada por elas. Ela não aguentou mais e foi embora. Bem, ela e o marido foram embora. Eu estava com o coração partido. Isso aconteceu no último mês. Precisamos uns dos outros na congregação. Precisamos apoiar e edificar uns aos outros. Quando não entendemos isso, nos sentimos sozinhos e solitários. Sentimo-nos traídos. Depressivo. E simplesmente decidimos que não aguentamos mais a forma como somos tratados, então pare de ir às reuniões. Excluímos as pessoas de nossas vidas.  

 

Todo mundo tem maneiras diferentes de lidar com a vida. Não somos todos iguais. E somos todos imperfeitos.  

 

 

That's why we serve Jehovah and not men, faith needs to be strengthened, there is no one perfect, leaving Jehovah because of being human is a lack of faith in Jehovah. Those who leave and abandon are left without peace 

[IceBreeze]

14 minutes ago, Loyal said:

That's why we serve Jehovah and not men, faith needs to be strengthened, there is no one perfect, leaving Jehovah because of being human is a lack of faith in Jehovah. Those who leave and abandon are left without peace 

Very to the point, but also very true. Thank you for sharing.

[Lori]

57 minutes ago, Loyal said:

That's why we serve Jehovah and not men, faith needs to be strengthened, there is no one perfect, leaving Jehovah because of being human is a lack of faith in Jehovah. Those who leave and abandon are left without peace 

 

I don't think that you fully understand what someone who is being treated badly by other brothers and sisters and how that can affect you mentally and emotionally.    I'm glad that you haven't experienced that.   But some of us have.  And some of us are hanging on to dear life to the Truth.    And to Jehovah.   Some of us have left because of it.    When you are so torn down by people who are support to love you like Jehovah says that we should love each other, you don't want to go back to the Hall. 

How do you make it to the end of this system without the support of other people who love and support you emotionally and psychologically?    People can have faith in Jehovah and still suffer from mental illness.    

[Lori]

1 hour ago, Loyal said:

That's why we serve Jehovah and not men, faith needs to be strengthened, there is no one perfect, leaving Jehovah because of being human is a lack of faith in Jehovah. Those who leave and abandon are left without peace 

And we should also think about how our actions affect our brothers and sisters.....    

Because those actions do affect us. 

[angellionel]

It deeply saddens me when I read or hear about friends giving up and leaving the truth. I've seen it myself over the years. Thankfully, some eventually return.

 

We do well to always keep in mind Paul's words as found in 1 Corinthians 10:12. No matter how spiritually strong we may feel, in the end, we are imperfect, subject to sin, and so vulnerable to the traps set before us by a highly intelligent and crafty wicked spirit. We only stand because of Jehovah's mercy, kindness, and protection. The moment we start to allow the pressures of this world to get to us, causing us to draw away from Jehovah, we start to look to solve the problems we face on our own. This is why we fail. This is why we give up.

 

In the Bible, as we know, there are many examples of men and women who, despite hardships and problems set upon them, remained faithful. They did not turn their backs on Jehovah. Joseph and Job always come to mind. There are many modern-day examples as well. There is no doubt that the pressures are real and that they are emotionally and mentally draining and debilitating. But really, that is when we need Jehovah's guidance the most. That is when our prayers of supplication for help should intensify. That is when we show if the truth is really in us.

[IceBreeze]

1 hour ago, Lori said:

 

I don't think that you fully understand what someone who is being treated badly by other brothers and sisters and how that can affect you mentally and emotionally.    I'm glad that you haven't experienced that.   But some of us have.  And some of us are hanging on to dear life to the Truth.    And to Jehovah.   Some of us have left because of it.    When you are so torn down by people who are support to love you like Jehovah says that we should love each other, you don't want to go back to the Hall. 

How do you make it to the end of this system without the support of other people who love and support you emotionally and psychologically?    People can have faith in Jehovah and still suffer from mental illness.    

@Lori I do perfectly understand what you say. I went through very traumatic experiences, let me put it that way, but that is still no reason to leave the organization, and Jehovah. I fully agree to what @Loyal brought up in his post.

 

If you go to WallMart for your daily needs, food etc, but one single cashier is acting out of context, not friendly to you. You avoid the complete WallMart company?

[Lori]

58 minutes ago, Loyal said:

 can you imagine someone who started studying the bible now and is here in this community and reads these comments, where you inform that people leave the hall because of brothers?  how would that person feel?  a student who already demonstrates faith simply will not let himself be shaken by this, I say again nothing justifies leaving the meetings, the field because of problems with imperfect people, no matter how difficult it is, we need to be warm within the congregation in the midst of it , like a porcupine in the cold, they prick themselves but stay warm and don't die, if you have a problem, and you can't go to the congregation of origin, the ideal is to change the congregation, but never stop attending the field and meeting! Jehovah does not deserve such contempt!

 Why do we need empathy to soothe hurt feelings?

11 Empathy is like a powerful ointment; it can help to heal hurt feelings. Some inactive ones have struggled for years with bitter feelings toward someone in  the congregation. These feelings have stifled the desire to return to Jehovah. Some may think that they were treated unjustly. They may need someone who will listen to them and understand their feelings. (Jas. 1:19) María, who was inactive at one time, says, “I needed a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, and a helping hand to guide me.”

 

https://www.jw.org/en/library/magazines/watchtower-study-june-2020/Return-to-Me/

[Hope]

On 7/18/2023 at 2:41 PM, ChrisW said:

I'm not talking about non-jws in general. I'm talking about those that leave Jehovah. There's a difference in their inner person and their outer person reflects that. 

Absolutely. The bad conscience, the purposeful lack of respect for Jehovah, even less physical/ emotional/ definitely spiritual care for themselves can very much impact the outward appearance of people who have left or never accepted Jehovah (but know about Him).

 

My own son - a physically good-looking man. During a time period when he was not worshipping Jehovah on any level, he looked so rough that if I didn't know it was him, I wouldn't have recognized him on a bus. His hair- on head and beard, even his countenance was not right. He looked dark and worldly... I don't know how else to describe it. 😭

 

Jehovah gives an inner light that adds indescribable beauty. It's not difficult to notice when it's gone.. 

[carlos]

11 hours ago, Lori said:

And we should also think about how our actions affect our brothers and sisters.....    

Because those actions do affect us. 

 

Lori, it speaks volumes that you are still faithfully serving our Heavenly Father despite all you have been through. It's clear you love him and want to do what's right. Jehovah must feel very proud when he looks at your endurance. It reminds me of the video where Jehovah, Jesus and the whole heavenly armies are looking at Caleb and Sophia facing temptations, and how they all clap when they both keep their integrity.

 

Unfortunately it's true that some Christians are sometimes stumbled due to the way they are treated by other members of the congregation. Jesus himself pointed out how serious this is when he said that "whoever stumbles one of these little ones who have faith, it would be better for him if a millstone that is turned by a donkey were put around his neck and he were pitched into the sea" (Mark 9:42).

 

On the other hand, it's also true that Jehovah deserves our love and our service unconditionally. Nothing, not even injustices in the congregation, justifies leaving Jehovah. This is what some members here are trying to say. Jehovah can give us the power to endure any situation. Proverbs 24:16 admits that "the righteous one may fall seven times" yet "he will get up again". Jehovah still loves dearly those who have been stumbled by others, and reaches out to them: “I myself will feed my sheep, and I myself will make them lie down,” declares the Sovereign Lord Jehovah. “The lost one I will search for, the stray I will bring back, the injured I will bandage, and the weak I will strengthen” (Ezekiel 34:15, 16).

 

The lesson for me in this whole conversation is that we all need to be very careful not to hurt the feelings of others, since we have no idea of what they may be going through.

 

[Græme]

I was thinking this very same thing recently; whilst beauty is in the eye of the beholder, …I have travelled to many places …visiting several international conventions and meetings - and even traditional beauty is a rarity in the truth.

 

For example I have been to Scandinavia, and I saw only a few attractive witnesses …..which I am disappointed to say, but true in my opinion; maybe this is just a western perception of beauty, or perhaps it’s about general ratios to the world i.e. 1:1000 witnesses - it may be a numbers game?

 

However there is a paradox in this - I think maybe the truth attracts a certain individual: plain, simple, unassuming - yes, although this is a personality trait, or style aspect and not just a physical characteristic …I think it can be related to image too: i.e. the ‘plain Jane, girl next door type’ 

 

*For example, I doubt you would see a woman like Cara Delevingne, or Beyoncé take to the truth? (whilst you never know - I hope you see my point of view without any prejudice intended friends) …admittedly perhaps this says much about my standards as I appreciate I am referring to a model, or singer as examples, however I am using common examples …but I think this is where the paradox lies, a certain type of ‘personality’ or ‘character’ (who assumes his/her value in the world) would not be associated with our life-style …meaning the truth doesn’t attract a certain type of person; ….someone in the thread mentioned the Canaanite women - I think this is the an example in point, but it’s not simply about clothing, make-up or the options of plastic surgery in our modern times - even compared to beauty standards of the world - it does seem in the truth beauty is not on par with what we see, and please I do not mean that in any vulgar sense - it just seems in the truth the percentage of standard beauty is a rarity.

 

P.s. I have seen some modestly dressed ‘worldly’ people without extensive make-up - who are just naturally beautiful ….the paradox is I don’t see attractive sisters more often. 

 

I will say this perhaps is evident that some brothers have - let’s say alternative standards of beauty that dictates preferences e.g. to women of a certain body type, image, i.e. dress sense etc - so speaking as a man this may be an influence of *worldly perceptions of beauty. 

 

Anyway it’s refreshing to have your honest viewpoint and genuine comment, I am sure many a brother and sister have thought this!

 

P.s. just to reiterate before any sisters, or brother becomes upset or offended, I’m sure this topic is the opinion of both sexes!

[Hope]

I can't say that I agree.  I have seen and known personally many brothers and sisters who are legitimately attractive enough to be models (perhaps not all as traditionally tall, but definitely face-wise).  I've worked in advertising and in the entertainment fields and I know what qualities are used in the marketplace.

 

Yes, a modest attitude is more attracted to the Truth for sure; Jehovah draws humble hearts.  But there are just as many haughty, physically unattractive people as there are humble ones... and likely, vice versa.  Good looks matter little when talking about someone's heart.

 

I'm sorry you haven't seen many good-looking JWs @Græme.  Maybe you're not looking hard enough. :shrug: 

[IceBreeze]

1 minute ago, Hope said:

I'm sorry you haven't seen many good-looking JWs @Græme.  Maybe you're not looking hard enough. :shrug: 

Maybe it is his own personal viewpoint, but yes, there is plenty of goodlooking JW's, plus they have a beautiful heart.

[Tia]

On 8/28/2023 at 4:33 PM, Hope said:

I can't say that I agree.  I have seen and known personally many brothers and sisters who are legitimately attractive enough to be models (perhaps not all as traditionally tall, but definitely face-wise).  I've worked in advertising and in the entertainment fields and I know what qualities are used in the marketplace.

 

Yes, a modest attitude is more attracted to the Truth for sure; Jehovah draws humble hearts.  But there are just as many haughty, physically unattractive people as there are humble ones... and likely, vice versa.  Good looks matter little when talking about someone's heart.

 

I'm sorry you haven't seen many good-looking JWs @Græme.  Maybe you're not looking hard enough. :shrug: 

Alrighty then!   My sentiments exactly!!!  

Edited August 30, 2023 by Tia

[Fallbrookian]

I remember when I used to work in Long Beach, Calif, right down the street from the Long Beach convention center and there were regional conventions going on almost every weekend during the summer. One of my co-workers who knew I was a JW of course, noticed all the JW's walking around during lunch and before and after the convention and commented to me what an attractive and well dressed group of people!  

[hatcheckgirl]

That reminded me, Nancy, of my very first assembly I was invited to (even before going to a meeting or having a Bible Study). I was amazed at the high level of dress standard and grooming - it just made everyone look another level of “attractive”.  But too, they all had what is missing in a normal crowd of good-looking people -  the genuine smiles, the happy faces as they meet up with friends, than wonderful spirit we just take as normal now in the truth. We are just a happier bunch of well-dressed people, and that makes us look pretty good.

 

(And compare that image with a bunch of fans at the football. That’s supposed to be their happy time, but their faces says it all! 😉).