A good joke

[rocket]

There were three little boys visiting their grandparents.

The oldest came out and asked his grandpa, "Can you make a sound like a Frog, Grandpa?"

Grandpa, being in a kind of ill mood, responds,"No, I don't really want to make the sound of a frog now."

So, the second little boy comes out and asks his grandfather, "Will you please make a sound like a frog?"

Grandpa again says, "No. not now. I don't really want to do that. I'm in a grumpy mood. Maybe later."

Then the third little boy comes out and says, "Grandpa, oh please... Please will you make a sound like a frog?"

"Why do all of you boys want me to make a sound like a frog?" Grandpa asked.

The little boy replied with a hopeful face,

Spoiler

"Well Mom said that when you croak, we get to go to Disney World!"

 

[dljbsp]

Cop: "I'm pulling you over for speeding"

Guy: I was only trying to keep up with traffic"

Cop: "There wasn't anyone in front of you for miles".

Guy: "I know that's how far behind I was!"

[Keep Fighting]

I lost my job at the bank the other day, I had only worked one day.
There was a lady who asked me if I could check her balance.

Then I pushed her.

[Mike047]

However, the good news is that you can keep the day job.

[rocket]

A blonde is tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid. So she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house.

 

The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand.

 

Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of  paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. He goes over and asks her if she is OK. She replies, yes. He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting. He then asks her why she has a ski jacket over her fur coat. She replies 

Spoiler

that she was reading the directions on the paint can and it says, for best results, put on two coats.

[Mike047]

Lynn, it really would be best to leave out sexist jokes and others that show what seems to be a poor taste.

[pnutts]

14 hours ago, rocket said:

all blondes are perceived as stupid

I used to resemble that remark.

That is I am a blue eyed Was Blond.

[rocket]

9 hours ago, pnutts said:

I used to resemble that remark.

That is I am a blue eyed Was Blond.

 

Ya, me too, now I enjoy blond and bald jokes. Pokes fun at myself.

 

[Old]

What is wrong with this picture?

[Qapla]

 

[Tortuga]

35 minutes ago, Old said:

What is wrong with this picture?

Because he is Catholic?

 

[Cool.As.Ice]

Long hair? 

[Tortuga]

Conundrum: When the government wants to hire a conspiracy theorist to imagine worst case scenarios so the government can prevent them. Should they take the job or not...

 

Conundrum: When the government tells the conspiracy theorist that aliens are real. Should they believe them or not...

[minister159]

2 hours ago, Tortuga said:

Conundrum: When the government wants to hire a conspiracy theorist to imagine worst case scenarios so the government can prevent them. Should they take the job or not...

 

Conundrum: When the government tells the conspiracy theorist that aliens are real. Should they believe them or not...

That's more like an enigma, disguised as a paradox, wrapped in a conundrum.   

[Pabo]

On 5/23/2025 at 4:56 AM, minister159 said:

That's more like an enigma, disguised as a paradox, wrapped in a conundrum.   

 

 

[Cool.As.Ice]

What do you call a snail with a sail?

A snailor!

[Tortuga]

Do you know what Elvis had for lunch every day?

 

He ate nothing but a hotdog, frying all day long...