Why I decided to unplug from social media

[New World Explorer]

It's very hard (for me) to catch up with friends from all over the world ... Instagram gives me this opportunity!

[Omoyeme]

4 hours ago, Gregexplore said:

It's very hard (for me) to catch up with friends from all over the world ... 

But bro...I'm right hereeee!  Have a donut!

 

[Jwdadsc4]

On 7/24/2018 at 9:15 PM, Katty said:

This is by no means me saying that others should do the same. Everyone's circumstances are unique and it's something that has personally benefitted me. If I see benefit and less risk in replugging, I might do so. Also I am on Skype and discord, but I'll get into that in a bit

 

So the main thing I unplugged from was Facebook. For me, Facebook made it way too easy to find association with people in the world. I hate to say, but I dated an unbeliever and then talked to others regularly. Pretty much all were people I met or were contacted by on Facebook. When I decided to put my worldly association behind me, I decided the best thing was to eliminate my Facebook profile once and for all.

 

Instagram was a different situation. It wasn't so much affecting my association negatively so much as it was affecting my self esteem. Idk how it is with others, but for me, it's difficult to not compare myself negatively to other people when faced with situations like that. Now I did watch the "be social network smart" video and I recall it touching on that. But when I see things, it's sometimes hard to see that it's not the whole reality. Maybe some of the single ones can give their thoughts on ig too, because I find it's also a lot of images that, while not bad in themselves might make me feel more jealous of people in relationship and how much fun they seem to be having, than I would otherwise be, because all that's shown is the dates, and the flowers and the gifts and not the mundane things or the arguments etc. I mean, it's understandable but it's easy to get a warped view of reality that way.

 

I was never much involved with Twitter and Pinterest  often drives me mad. It's just too much muchness.

 

So what are y'all's thoughts on social media? Anyone else felt many of the negative effects of it or have learned to master it like the video taught us XD

I agree with you on worldly association through Facebook and and as a single dad Instagram is not very encouraging when you see witness couples going on their honeymoon or vacations. And I'm trying to focus on making my relationships stronger with my brothers and sisters in the congregation.

[Katty]

On 7/28/2018 at 1:53 PM, Saffron said:

I unplugged from Facebook years ago and do not regret it. Don't miss it one bit. JWtalk fills that void in a much better way.

 

Up until a year or two ago, I had a personal Instagram account where I had mostly friends from my congregation and others near here. That was going pretty well until some people I had a problem with decided to use this platform in ways that created more problems. Plus, I'll confess, there were other things that made life unpleasant. Like this sister (wife of one of my closest friends) who is always too busy or too ill to come to any of my gatherings.. I saw pictures of her at another person's gathering and felt hurt. I had no right to feel that way, but I did.. That was it. I decided that it was more trouble than it was worth and left it. 

 

All I have now is a business page (my art). It's public and I'm going to be working it a bit more now to up the followers for my newest project. There have been no problems with this IG account other than occasionally running across apostate garbage. It's pretty cool, actually. I've gotten to know some very talented sisters this way. 

 

All in all, I say that the decision about whether or not to participate on social media is a personal one and depends on the individual. Great application of Mark 9:47 and Proverbs 22:3, @Katty. 😊

Ive gone through stuff like that too. Seeing friends blow me off to do something together. It is rather hurtful. There are so many reasons Instagram was ruining my self esteem

On 7/28/2018 at 11:28 PM, Omoyeme said:

But bro...I'm right hereeee!  Have a donut!

 

*sneaks in to take a donut*

[Xplore]

Oh yes. Definetly facebook. I remember before, that I used to watch others profile and picture. And before I knew it, time went by and it wasn't really healthy for me to do that, because I would tend to feel jealous or compare it to my life. Now I have control over it. I use facebook really to communicate with friends and family. But I think you made a good decision. I think I could really benefit from it too and just stick to messenger really..

Edited July 31, 2018 by Dertzey

[New World Explorer]

On 7/30/2018 at 7:36 AM, Jwdadsc4 said:

Instagram is not very encouraging when you see witness couples going on their honeymoon or vacations.

Hmmm... It just shows dear brother how everybody is different, because in my case it makes me happy seeing others happy and I wish them to enjoy their vacation.

Nothing evokes in me the feelings of envy or jealousy .. I think I am just a simple person. (not saying that you're displaying such feelings )

[Katty]

35 minutes ago, Gregexplore said:

Hmmm... It just shows dear brother how everybody is different, because in my case it makes me happy seeing others happy and I wish them to enjoy their vacation.

Nothing evokes in me the feelings of envy or jealousy .. I think I am just a simple person. (not saying that you're displaying such feelings )

True, but at the same time if you're in a relationship, you have a different perspective from when you're not, especially if you were once in a relationship that you're no longer in.

Also, if you have the means to travel, you see things differently from when you don't.

For me, it's not that I don't rejoice with my brothers who rejoice. I see it more as, like this:

I have food at home, it's not fancy, but I'm content with it, but I get invited to meet with my friends at a restaurant, but I can't afford to buy anything. I still enjoy myself with my friends, and if they're enjoying what they're having, of course seeing them happy makes me happy. But seeing them enjoy this wonderful food can easily make me long for what they have, and no longer be content with the food I had at home. It's human nature.

It's not about being jealousy. It's about when you see a lot of what you don't have, it's difficult to be content with what you do have.

 

[Hope]

17 minutes ago, Katty said:

True, but at the same time if you're in a relationship, you have a different perspective from when you're not, especially if you were once in a relationship that you're no longer in.

Also, if you have the means to travel, you see things differently from when you don't.

For me, it's not that I don't rejoice with my brothers who rejoice. I see it more as, like this:

I have food at home, it's not fancy, but I'm content with it, but I get invited to meet with my friends at a restaurant, but I can't afford to buy anything. I still enjoy myself with my friends, and if they're enjoying what they're having, of course seeing them happy makes me happy. But seeing them enjoy this wonderful food can easily make me long for what they have, and no longer be content with the food I had at home. It's human nature.

It's not about being jealousy. It's about when you see a lot of what you don't have, it's difficult to be content with what you do have.

 

 

That's exactly the feeling I have about Instagram... excellent description @Katty❤️   It's really not about jealousy.  It's about missing *anything* comparable in one's own life.  I'm very happy to wish the best for people's anniversaries and I'm happy when people are getting married.  But I tend to avoid wedding & vacation photos... even family photos sometimes, because it magnifies what's missing, yet longed for, in my own life.  @Gregexplore -  viewing loads of pictures even like your avatar (happy couple on a vacation) can elicit sad feelings in others.  

 

Those feelings make me feel bad just for having them and I don't need that aggravation.    So, I avoid Instagram for the most part.  Facebook, however, allows for incredible conversations and those are good for me.

[Meditate!]

9 hours ago, Katty said:

True, but at the same time if you're in a relationship, you have a different perspective from when you're not, especially if you were once in a relationship that you're no longer in.

Also, if you have the means to travel, you see things differently from when you don't.

For me, it's not that I don't rejoice with my brothers who rejoice. I see it more as, like this:

I have food at home, it's not fancy, but I'm content with it, but I get invited to meet with my friends at a restaurant, but I can't afford to buy anything. I still enjoy myself with my friends, and if they're enjoying what they're having, of course seeing them happy makes me happy. But seeing them enjoy this wonderful food can easily make me long for what they have, and no longer be content with the food I had at home. It's human nature.

It's not about being jealousy. It's about when you see a lot of what you don't have, it's difficult to be content with what you do have.

 

Me too (or rather us).  I really don't mind, much others enjoying themselves... we did when we had a lot of spare cash; why should i feel different now.

 

We had a recent invite to go to a themed restaurant.. but it was a lot of money upfront and sadly not the type of food we like personally, anyway .We feel really bad; as though we don't want to be with our brothers. I don't want anyone paying for us. We can't really go and not eat there  either.  embarrassing on many fronts.

[New World Explorer]

11 hours ago, Katty said:

It's about when you see a lot of what you don't have, it's difficult to be content with what you do have.

Once again we are all different.

Example from real life my good friend drives $120.000 Mercedes

We often go in service together ....

Another drives top SUV Lexus hybrid ...(another expensive car)

We too often go in service together.... (BTW he often buys me donuts too.. lately trying to convince him to STOP )

 

Does this want me to desire to have better car? NO! - I am simple person, kind of disconnected from desiring things.

I am content with what I have .. 

This is how I view Instagram as well...  I do not have difficulty being content with what I have, when I see others are enjoying "better" things ...

 

Katty ...that's how I tick! Simple minded person happy for others.

Can't help myself

[New World Explorer]

11 hours ago, Hope said:

@Gregexplore -  viewing loads of pictures even like your avatar (happy couple on a vacation) can elicit sad feelings in others.  

Very sad indeed.

That's why God's Kingdom will be such a wonderful equalizer.

Personally can't wait to see ALL being happy and satisfied with life ...

[New World Explorer]

It really boils down to personal decision in relation to social media ...unplugging from the topic now... 

[Katty]

Just now, Gregexplore said:

Once again we are all different.

Example from real life my good friend drives $120.000 Mercedes

We often go in service together ....

Another drives top SUV Lexus hybrid ...(another expensive car)

We too often go in service together.... (BTW he often buys me donuts too.. lately trying to convince him to STOP )

 

Does this want me to desire to have better car? NO! - I am simple person, kind of disconnected from desiring things.

I am content with what I have .. 

This is how I view Instagram as well...  I do not have difficulty being content with what I have, when I see others are enjoying "better" things ...

 

Katty ...that's how I tick! Simple minded person happy for others.

Can't help myself

To be fair, I'm like this too.

Again, seeing other people have things does not bother me.

But I have a different perspective depending on what I have too, because if i have a car, even if it's an old beater car, I'm happy with it.

If I don't have a car, I don't necessarily envy people who do have a car. I'm happy that they were able to have this. But, it's generally a bigger challenge for me to stay content with no car than with that beater car; it's not even about what I have. It's about what I can accomplish. I'm in a place where you can accomplish very little without a car.

I don't envy or get jealous of anything someone has that I don't. Whern I'm accomplishing my life, I'm pretty content. It's only when I see so many examples of the things I haven't accomplished, that I start to feel down about myself or think I might not have such a good life. 

I had a fairly rough life, overall. It's not a bad life:could be way worse, and I'm grateful. But, I've struggled with most things, and a lot in life came later with me than with most people. If it's just comparing me with me in the past, generally I can feel pretty good because I'm always improving

But when I'm faced with comparing myself with other people, I quickly get depressed. That's why it's important for me to eliminate any situation that makes me feel compelled to compare myself to other people. 

Now, that's not to say, in the future, I won't have a problem seeing posts without comparing myself to others. It really depends on if I can get to place where I'm happy with what I've accomplished.

 

At the end of the day, it has nothing to do with how I feel about them. It's about how I feel about me. It's something I need to work on.

Edited August 1, 2018 by Katty

[Alexa]

2 hours ago, Gregexplore said:

Once again we are all different.

Example from real life my good friend drives $120.000 Mercedes

We often go in service together ....

Another drives top SUV Lexus hybrid ...(another expensive car)

We too often go in service together.... (BTW he often buys me donuts too.. lately trying to convince him to STOP )

 

Does this want me to desire to have better car? NO! - I am simple person, kind of disconnected from desiring things.

I am content with what I have .. 

This is how I view Instagram as well...  I do not have difficulty being content with what I have, when I see others are enjoying "better" things ...

 

Katty ...that's how I tick! Simple minded person happy for others.

Can't help myself

Like, this is how I feel when someone had a bmw parked in bethel

[Tortuga]

16 hours ago, Gregexplore said:

Hmmm... It just shows dear brother how everybody is different, because in my case it makes me happy seeing others happy and I wish them to enjoy their vacation.

Nothing evokes in me the feelings of envy or jealousy .. I think I am just a simple person. (not saying that you're displaying such feelings )

I like to share other peoples joy and I like them to share my joy. My wife and I recently had a very enjoyable vacation for our anniversary, some friends then had us over for dinner and asked us to bring our vacation pictures. We enjoyed reliving the vacation with them and they shared our joy, there weren't any bad feelings because we were able to do something that they couldn't do. However I don't share any pictures of it on social media because it feels one -sided, like I'm bragging instead of sharing although I don't think other people are bragging when they share their pictures. Everyone is different. 

[Guri]

5 hours ago, Gregexplore said:

my good friend drives $120.000 Mercedes

We often go in service together ....

Greg, 

 

Has he ever heard Jwtalk.net? 

[Tortuga]

5 minutes ago, Guri said:

Greg, 

 

Has he ever heard Jwtalk.net? 

Our COBE has new Mercedes. He is a sales representative and it is provided by the company he works for. I doubt anyone in this area cares one way or the other...

[Guri]

8 minutes ago, Tortuga said:

Our COBE has new Mercedes. He is a sales representative and it is provided by the company he works for. I doubt anyone in this area cares one way or the other...

I didn’t mean that.  

[Meditate!]

5 minutes ago, Katty said:

To be fair, I'm like this too.

Again, seeing other people have things does not bother me.

But I have a different perspective depending on what I have too, because if i have a car, even if it's an old beater car, I'm happy with it.

If I don't have a car, I don't necessarily envy people who do have a car. I'm happy that they were able to have this. But, it's generally a bigger challenge for me to stay content with no car than with that beater car; it's not even about what I have. It's about what I can accomplish. I'm in a place where you can accomplish very little without a car.

I don't envy or get jealous of anything someone has that I don't. Whern I'm accomplishing my life, I'm pretty content. It's only when I see so many examples of the things I haven't accomplished, that I start to feel down about myself or think I might not have such a good life. 

I had a fairly rough life, overall. It's not a bad life:could be way worse, and I'm grateful. But, I've struggled with most things, and a lot in life came later with me than with most people. If it's just comparing me with me in the past, generally I can feel pretty good because I'm always improving

But when I'm faced with comparing myself with other people, I quickly get depressed. That's why it's important for me to eliminate any situation that makes me feel compelled to compare myself to other people. 

Now, that's not to say, in the future, I won't have a problem seeing posts without comparing myself to others. It really depends on if I can get to place where I'm happy with what I've accomplished.

 

At the end of the day, it has nothing to do with how I feel about them. It's about how I feel about me. It's something I need to work on.

I admire anyone who sees the real picture!

 

Seeing yourself as you are is a gift... Most; myself included often have to ask the real reason for the feelings I/they have.. or more often, rationalise their feelings! I think you are in a good place to sort it out. At least you know where you are. 

 

Someone, I can't recall, said earlier that knowing a person's personality can be used against them. This is true and i have seen it. People who have big egos can sometimes be easily manipulated by praise. Others who are friendly but easily walked over can have their friendliness abused and used against, their will. However,  because they don't like confrontation (or rather don't like or know how to assert themselves) they let things roll and are usually unhappy/dismissive on the inside... feeling liket they have been mugged.

 

I know of a person who sold a car they liked for one that couldn't carry the stuff another 'friend' wanted them to.  What a state to be in! I really felt for this person; as honest as the day is long and genuinely helpful with it. But to have that friendship hijacked was painful to watch.

 

No amount of reasoning could get the person to view their own wants and needs as necessary too. Shame on the person who abused the personality of another.

[Adrianne]

Other than news and weather once a day, I don't really watch "broadcast" TV.  I
 
EDIT": I should point out that I don't have cable, a "dish" or satellite access or anything like that.  I only have an outside TV antenna (remember those?) and we are out at the 50 mile limit or fringe area.

i have an antenna and a digital recorder. I just de activated Facebook.

i found it was depressing me and it was a time waster for me


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Pro

[GrumpysWife]

I have a facebook account but lately I don't go there much. For me it was a big time waster and it was getting boring. 

[Cheeks]

I def can relate to what some have pointed out to regarding Instagram. 

 

For a while I used to get very envious of others on what they posted – it appeared as if they had no problems, stress or worries and they just surfed through life with no problems while the rest of us are dealing with a mountain of issues and feel like a turtle on its back just struggling.  I felt as if it was constantly being thrown in my face and/or that they were flaunting things.

 

I deleted my account for a while, to get some perspective & focus on spiritual things.  I went through a bad time with depression, family issues, job loss, blah blah and the negativity I was distinguishing from Instagram was a liability to me.  I’m back on it now, with a few ppl deleted.  I’m a huge dog lover so my main viewing is for puppies or animals in general lol! 

 

Like anything else, Instagram can be something good or bad – it depends how it’s used and really we are the one that can dictate whether we control it or it controls us.

[kejedo]

I opened a FB account after a book signing, for business reasons. I was still not sure if I wanted (needed) to write for profit, or just continue as a hobby writer (have been offered contracts.) After opening my fb account, I got lots of friend's requests, but mostly my worldly and husb's family, in New England, where we aren't.  Husb, not in the truth, but some of his cousins are; no Witnesses on my side.  I tapered down my FB account as I realized I do not need to accept writing gigs (for now.) This is the only way our families keep in touch with me (for both of us, husb not online.) There was an informal fam reunion in June, but I was in the hospital. My husband's brother passed away two years ago, without a service, b/c he had donated his body to medical science, and because he didn't want to burden family members with the expense of traveling. I made a collage for brother-in-law's  daughter (for the June event) and would have made a couple more for his other children, had I not gotten sick. Still numerous doc and hosp appts, but we are intending to go to New England in Sept to catch up with some of our relatives and have an even more informal reunion in a public park. If any of my brother-in-law's children want a duplicate from the collage, I will send them copies of the pictures. So my point is- we will, likely, get to see some of our worldly relatives and Witness relatives next month due to keeping in touch through fb. We have not seen many of our relatives for twenty or thirty years. I don't access any other Social Media. I will also get to attend the Sunday meeting with the congregation I originally studied with in the 1980s. Got Baptized in 1987, after moving to  different state. A young pioneer, 27, tells me that she uses Social Media but follows the Christian principles we use, in general.  Responses on this thread make sense.  Incidentally, there are many of our "Friends" who would object to my participation on this forum. Can't please everyone; just try to please Jehovah. 

Edited August 23, 2018 by kejedo

[Brandon]

Also I am on Skype , but I'll get into that in a bit

 

are you still on telegram?

 

 

 

 

Edited September 27, 2018 by Brandon
technical glitch

[well]

I deactivated my face book account, and I will activate it if I want to see how my friends are doing for some hours... But, I easily get bored by it, so I prefer Instagram and it's true that sometimes I get jealous of what others have got and done, esp when I was in depressed mood... At that time, I just unistalled the app.