Jump to content
JWTalk - Jehovah's Witnesses Online Community

Recommended Posts

Over the years I have been writting down all of my favorite quotes said by friends, family, strangers, and so on.  I put them in a book called "The Best of Quotes".  All quotes are either very funny, clever, or stupid.  So if I live to be old, I'll have this to look back on. 

 

Here's some of the quotes I have:

 

Friend:  "Which complex do you live in?"

Me:  "Aston Woods"

Friend:  Oh!  That's the one where I don't know where it is."

 

 

Friend:  "I had a dream last night--"

Me:  "Me too!"

Friend:  *thumbs down* "Boo!  Only me!"

 

 

Friend:  "I had time to go home.  DId I menton I was already in my house?"

 

 

Study talking to toddler son:  "We're gonna talk to God.  You wanna talk to God?"

Toddler:  *looks at phone*

 

 

Friend 1:  "I heard of a guy in a motorcycle accident and his head was on one side of the street and his body was on the other."

Friend 2:  "That's a bad day."

 

 

Friend:  "So the lady asked me which marriage I was, like if it was my first of second.  And I said 'my 1st', and she put down a zero.  It's my zeroth marriage.  I mean, come on, that's not even a word!"

 

 

Let me hear some of your favorite quotes!  Maybe I'll add it to my book!  And I'll post more of my quotes as we go along.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Those are more like jokes or small andidotes to me.  Here are a few of my favorite quotes or sayings:

 

1) If Jehovah loves you, you have everything you need

 

2) Developing the mind is important, but developing a conscience is the most precious gift parents can give their children.

 

3) Small compromises lead to BIG disasters.

 

4) Don't live for the moment - live for the future.

 

5) It doesn't pay to disobey.

 

6) Just because we are made of dust doesn't mean Jehovah treats us like dirt.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

A customer that used to frequent a pizza place I worked in many, many years ago was a Psychiatrist from India. He had lived and practiced in several countries. I asked him if he found things different here (the US) then where he was from.

 

He said, "Nope, people are crazy the same all over the world."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 months later...

Heres a couple I heard which prove rote memorizing phrases and prayers is not useful.

 

A.) One of my nephews learned the  American flag salute in school. He came home and recited it thus: A rutabaga to the flag....  (from the opening line....... I pledge allegiance to)

 

B.) I heard a young lad say "God is a string bean,"  after having heard someone say that  God is a Supreme Being 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

About JWTalk.net - Jehovah's Witnesses Online Community

Since 2006, JWTalk has proved to be a well-moderated online community for real Jehovah's Witnesses on the web. However, our community is not an official website of Jehovah's Witnesses. It is not endorsed, sponsored, or maintained by any legal entity used by Jehovah's Witnesses. We are a pro-JW community maintained by brothers and sisters around the world. We expect all community members to be active publishers in their congregations, therefore, please do not apply for membership if you are not currently one of Jehovah's Witnesses.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.

JWTalk 22.12.4 (changelog)