Pictures, jokes for the older ones

[Lee49]

Hey! What do you call an old snowman?

Spoiler

    Water    💦    🙄

 

[Lee49]

 Sad news: It is with great sadness that we report the passing of the Pillsbury Doughboy. The cause of his death was from a yeast infection and trauma from repeated pokes in his belly. Doughboy was buried in a greased coffin, with the gravesite piled high with flours. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects; including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, The Hostess Twinkies, and Capt. Crunch. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Born and raised in Minnesota, Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being flakey at times, he was still a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions. Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough, and his three children: John Dough, Jane Dough, and Dosey Dough. He and his wife also had one in the oven. He is also survived by his father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.   😢

[Qapla]

 

 

Edited March 27, 2023 by Qapla

[Tortuga]

1 hour ago, Lee49 said:

Sad news: It is with great sadness that we report the passing of the Pillsbury Doughboy.

Well, that's the way the cookie crumbles....😟

[Lee49]

36 minutes ago, Tortuga said:

Well, that's the way the cookie crumbles....😟

You may send flours or dough to the grieving  family.   🍚  🫓

[Tortuga]

1 minute ago, Lee49 said:

You may send flours or dough to the grieving  family.   🍚  🫓

I'll send a little butter just in case they are in a jam. Its a gravy situation...

[Lee49]

51 minutes ago, Tortuga said:

I'll send a little butter just in case they are in a jam. Its a gravy situation...

Sad and sourful !  🥖🥐

[Qapla]

I heard the family is holding their own and are high in spirits

 

 

[Tortuga]

2 minutes ago, Qapla said:

I heard the family is holding their own and are high in spirits

 

 

His widow, Play Dough should be able to adjust to the situation, I heard she is moldable. It must have been difficult being married to a guy that was constantly getting buttered up by everyone. She lived in his shadow. What a sticky situation.

[daydream]

 

Quote

This slightly surprised Lionel Richie's photo is rather fitting because we are also unsure why it exists. Remember that weird music video, though? It's almost as random as this sign!

 

 

It’s surprising to see how many tabs were taken, but it's interesting that they didn't even spell flyer correctly.

Edited April 3, 2023 by Imagine

[Pabo]

Reminds me of a "Wanted" poster someone had many years ago. It read like:

 

!!WANTED!!

DEAD or ALIVE

(Preferably Dead!)

They are wanted for the following:

• Willful destruction and mistreatment of their residence
• Negligence and cruelty to animals
• Stealing, lying and loud behavior
• Disregard to the law enforcement

***Inserted picture of their kids***

 

[bagwell1987]

Why did the tomato blush?

Spoiler

He saw the salad dressing!

 

What do you call a bunch of rabbits going backward?

Spoiler

A receding hair line.

 

A bear went into a restaurant and ordered a "grilled...........cheese"

The waiter said why the big pause?

Spoiler

I don't I was born with them 😄

 

Edited April 5, 2023 by bagwell1987

[bagwell1987]

At work they tell jokes and are accustomed to dirty jokes between them but I told them I don't listen to filth nor share it but here's some really good groaners. Now they look forward to my jokes! And yes I sometimes share a few of Lee's groaners 😄😄😄

[Qapla]

A priest, a preacher and a rabbit walk into a bar ...

 

The bar tender asks them each what they want to drink - the rabbit says, "I have no idea, I'm only here because of auto-correct.

 

Spoiler

It should have been "A priest, a preacher and a rabbi 

 

[Lee49]

44 minutes ago, Qapla said:

It should have been "A priest, a preacher and a rabbi 

got it, loved it! 

[Lee49]

What does a momma color wheel say to her daughter?

Spoiler

  

  Don't take that tone with me.

 

 

[bagwell1987]

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

Spoiler

Because the “P” is silent

 

How did the blonde die ice fishing?

Spoiler

She was hit by the zamboni.

 

[bagwell1987]

2 hours ago, bagwell1987 said:

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

  Hide contents

Because the “P” is silent

 

How did the blonde die ice fishing?

  Hide contents

She was hit by the zamboni.

 

🤭

[Pabo]

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45 of them, how does he have left?

 

  Hide contents

Diabetes.

 

 

[Lee49]

Why did Grandpa put wheels on his rocking chair?

Spoiler

He wanted to rock and roll. ( is this a repeat joke? I forgot! )

 

[bagwell1987]

Why did the letter A go to the bathroom and come out an E

 

Spoiler

Because he had a vowel movement 

 

[bagwell1987]

What did the fisherman say to the magician?

Spoiler

Pick a cod, any cod 😃

 

What time do you go to the dentist?

Spoiler

Tooth- hurty 😃

 

[Loopy]

Sad, Cheryl, really sad.

 

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[bagwell1987]

Oh but so cute you'll tell your friends!😄

[Lee49]

18 hours ago, bagwell1987 said:

Tooth- hurty

Repeat! Repeat!