A good joke

[bohemian]

A Dutchman has invented shoes that tell you how far you have walked!
 

Clever clogs.

[bohemian]

If I had a penny for everyone who said I have OCD, I’d have 1,573,942 pennies.

[Qapla]

The longest word in the English language is "smiles"

 

 

Spoiler

There is a    "mile"    between each "s"

 

[➕👇 ꓤꓱꓷꓠꓵ🎵Tone]

When you get older, you find different things funny...

Just Older

[Tortuga]

A store manager overheard a worker saying to a customer: “No, ma’am, we haven’t had any for some weeks now … and it doesn’t look as if we’ll be getting any soon.”

Alarmed, the manager rushed over to the customer who was walking out the door and said: “That isn’t true, ma’am. Of course, we’ll have some soon. In fact, we placed an order for it a couple of weeks ago.”

The manager then drew the worker aside and growled: “Never, never, never, never say we don’t have something. If we don’t have it, say we ordered it and it’s on its way. What was it she wanted?”

The worker answered: “Rain.”

[Friends just call me Ross]

Fool me once, shame on you.

Fool me 2,789 times...you're the weatherman.  

[Golfguy74]

I think I am in trouble with the police

 

They came to my house and said the neighbors complained that my dogs are chasing people on bikes.

 

I told them, that's crazy, my dogs don't have bikes.

[Lee49]

Concerning the Bird Flu that was circulating in South Africa.

 

[bohemian]

Sometimes I look back at my life and I think about all the people I have lost along the way...... and I get to wondering if my career choice as a tour guide was really a good idea.

[Lee49]

[Lee49]

This is an older joke that's been around for awhile, but here it is - 

 

What did Lot say to his wife when they were fleeing Sodom? - Answer:   'Is anybody following us?"

[Tortuga]

19 minutes ago, Lee49 said:

This is an older joke that's been around for awhile, but here it is - 

 

What did Lot say to his wife when they were fleeing Sodom? - Answer:   'Is anybody following us?"

 

"I smell smoke, did you leave the oven on?"

[Golfguy74]

[➕👇 ꓤꓱꓷꓠꓵ🎵Tone]

Visual gag.

Just Older
 

Edited March 1, 2020 by Maʹher-shalʹal-hash-baz
Ad pic

[dilip kumar]

The ideal cop...

[Qapla]

[dilip kumar]

Put up with one another

[Todd komaniak]

Did you hear about the man who was a dyslexic agnostic he wasn't really sure if there is a dog.

[dilip kumar]

Wishing and missing...

Conclusion of all things is...

[dilip kumar]

[daydream]

A light hearted look at something that is really scary.

 

Edited March 2, 2020 by M'Awan

[➕👇 ꓤꓱꓷꓠꓵ🎵Tone]

Guess who went cart witnessing today...?

Just Older

[pnutts]

On 3/2/2020 at 6:25 AM, M'Awan said:

A light hearted look at something that is really scary.

 

 

Hmmm seems more correct than it should be.

[Qapla]

Matt 13:3-8 is the illustration of the sower of seeds ...

 

 

 

What kind of seeds were they ?

[Qapla]

The answer is in verse 9 - "Let the one who has ears listen.” - He planted corn