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A Letter From The Research Department


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I remember reading Reasoning With the Sisters a few years ago. Unfortunately I had no success with it whatsoever! (No wonder I'm still single.) :no:  I got the book from a brother in the congregation, and thought it might be useful. So I decided to try out some of the introductions on his wife. Her response was: I'M MARRIED! Well, I immediately went back to the brother to ask him why the book didn't cover this conversation stopper. He didn't know how I could overcome that one either. :nope:

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Here is a small disclaimer: Any sisters who read the following please do not be offended. It is meant purely as a joke. I love all of my faithful sisters very much and look forward to spending eternity understanding how your minds work. :)  Just as I am sure you look forward to understanding us. :)  If you don't have a sense of humour don't keep reading. :nope:

 

 

 

 Oh Dear. Consequences for such as this. It is called, "We Exist". Now dear brother, you must deal with that fact. We are lurking....

 

 

 

 

 

 

TO ALL BROTHERS

 

 

Dear Brothers,

 

                       We regret to inform you that the much awaited release of the publication 'Insight on the Sisters' has once again been delayed. Although well-meaning researchers originally envisioned that this publication would be released in two volumes, they humbly admit that further research on the subject, and a desire to cover the subject both fully and accurately, has led them to the conclusion that this publication will require more than was at first thought. Work is currently in progress on Volume 23. It is felt that rather than release this publication progressively, as some might suggest, it would be better to release it as a complete reference work. While doing research on the later volumes of this work some of the earlier volumes have been seen to require revisions. This has been a contributing factor in the decision to delay the release until the work is completed.

 

  As we are unable at this point in time to announce an expected release date for this new publication, we suggest that you continue using our earlier publications on this subject as listed below:

 

 

Studies on the Sisters                 This seven volume work has proved most beneficial in providing

                                                    a basic understanding of the subject. While it has to be recognised

                                                    that some of the information in these volumes has proved to be

                                                    inaccurate, our current understanding is best portrayed in the

                                                    seventh volume of this series, 'The Finished Mystery'.

 

 

Reasoning with the Sisters         This field tested publication continues to be our most useful and

                                                    practical publication. While the sections 'Introductions' and 'How

                                                    You Might Respond to Potential Conversation Stoppers' have

                                                    proved most beneficial, we urge you also to become familiar with

                                                    the section towards the end of the book entitled 'Brothers' Quotes

                                                    Most Often Misapplied'. 

 

 

Tracts                                          Wife in a Peaceful New Earth, Why You Can Trust Brothers, 

                                                    What Hope For Single Sisters? and Who Really Rules the Household?

 

 

Brochures                                  What is the Purpose of a Wife? and Do Brothers Really Care? 

 

 

  On a more positive note, we are pleased to announce that the first of a series of three new books is due for release later this year. It is believed that this book, 'Questions Sisters Ask - What They Really Mean', will provide much help in the difficult task of understanding sisters. The other two books in the series, Questions Sisters Ask- How to Cope' and 'Questions Sisters Ask - Answers That May Work', are expected to be released sometime next year.

 

  Please be assured of our on-going and diligent efforts in your behalf.

 

                                          

 

 

                                                                                                  Your Brothers,

                                                                                                  Research Department

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How FUN!!!!!!

 

Years ago I worked with brothers and sisters in an office setting. Both brothers are elders and their wives support them in their service to Jehovah. One couple's son was raised in the truth but had of yet not made the truth his own.

 

Back then, 20 something years ago, there was a paper going around called The Rules. It was all about how men had to be kept in the dark and that the rules were constantly in a state of flux, thus keeping the men off balance, never quite knowing where they stood. One of the rules said something like: A man must be ready on time for any event, but it was the woman could change her whole outfit right at the last minute based on her weight fluctuation. This young man read the paper with the RULES on it and began fuming. It was supposed to be funny like the above text.

 

Alex was so upset, he immediately sat down at a typewriter and typed out the word He, over and over and over. Then he sprayed a tacky glue to the back of the page and took an Xacto knife cutting out each "He" and inserting it over the word "She" on the paper. As he was working on this a brother stopped by the office. He was studying with Alex and was a pioneer in his congregation. The brother asked Alex what he was working on so strenuously. Alex handed the brother the paper and said he was CORRECTING the words. The brother took the page and read the first line. Then he asked where he got that 'blasphemy!!!!!' Alex pointed to me with an accusatory finger. I was DYING inside because it was just a joke but held my face without a smile. I gently replied to the angry brother, "Just read it, Brother." He stood there reading for several minutes, handed it back to Alex and calmly stated, "It's true!" Poor Alex was 19 and unmarried and did not understand how it could be. Then we all broke out in hysterics - all but Alex, who was very perplexed. Now he knows better. He is married.  :uhhuh: 

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